


Forgivable Sins (BETA)

by PhantasticFiction



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF), Video Blogging & YouTube RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, M/M, Master/Servant
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-29
Updated: 2015-01-08
Packaged: 2018-02-06 15:54:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 24,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1863597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PhantasticFiction/pseuds/PhantasticFiction
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Not gonna write too much here right now cause im not sure whats going on with this, i just need to know how its sounding so far, Its gonna be about a master falling in love with his servent, they are gonna get older then they are in this first chapter</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Stranger Is Just a Friend You Probably Won't Like

 The carriage rocked along the dirt and gravel path. The only sound now was the birds outside and the clicking of the horses hooves on the ground. Phil crossed his arms and averted his eyes from his older brother and out the window.

“I just don't see why I need a servant,” Phil sighed.

“Don't you want to look dignified, women respect a young lord with a valet,” The brother replied.

“That doesn't matter to me,” Phil mumbled.

Phil didn't like the idea of having a personal servant. Just another tightly dressed nobel waiting on him hand and foot and never questioning his actions just doing. If he wanted that he would get a dog. At least the dog would have genuine feelings for him, unlike the plastic molded emotions that nobles presented on a daily basis to one another.

However Phil was a young lord of the Lester household, and soon enough he would need to choose a lesser nobel to be his valet.

The horse whinnied as the reigns were pulled and the carriage stopped. Phil waited for the carriage door to open and stepped out into the open air. As much as he hated the lectures from his older brother he hated being locked up in the mansion more. Accompanying his brother on an errand was a much better way to spend the day then sitting through another lesson with his nanny Mrs. Lutwidge. She probably had a first name, and probably a husband, but for as long as Phil had been with under her teachings he never heard either.

“This way my lords,” A small woman said leading them into the manor.

There were young children, between the ages of 4-8 playing outside in the front with a ball. They were dressed but their clothing seemed either a bit too big or too small. The kids stopped playing and looked up as Phil and his elder brother walked past them.

“Welcome to the house of Helena, this countries largest orphanage thanks to your dukedom's generous donations,” the small woman spoke. “If you will follow me this way we can discuss the business-”

“Phil, this is adult talk now,” The older brother began.

“I'm an adult,” Phil interjected, playing with the cuffs on his jacket.

“Yes, well, I think you would have a more interesting time playing with the other kid's for a bit, unless you really want to sit in the discussion for the donation and budget plan for this building” His brother smiled as Phil rolled his eyes.

“Fine, whatever, it doesn't matter”

“The older kids are in the room down the end of that hall,” The small woman pointed in some vague direction as her and the older brother went into an office.

Phil huffed as he turned on his heals and walked away.

“Go play with the kids,” Phil mumbled mocking his brother's voice.

Phil was 19 now, old enough so that he couldn't get away with behaving like a kid. But young enough that the adult's did not take him seriously either.

Phil made it to the end of the hallway and opened the door. Kids were running around happily playing, they all seemed in their own world until one of the older little girls, probably 13, noticed him.

“My lord!” She exclaimed and stood up straight, nodding her head forward to bow.

The younger children followed suit. Phil blushed, he had a soft spot for children.

“Please you don't have to call me that,” Phil tried to explain.

“My lord! May we help you?” a younger boy said.

A soft sigh fell from Phil's lips.

“No thank you little ones, I'd like you to continue playing.”

“Yes sir!” The first girl replied, however all the kids kept their heads down, bowing.

Phil backed out of the room. The kid's would not be able to relax with a nobel in the room. That is how they were raised. Put on your best face for a nobel and you may get adopted as a housemaid or a gardener or even an apprentice to be a cook. That was the best these kid's could hope for. But at least for now it seemed they were allowed to play and be kids.

Phil headed back down the hallway in search of a library. If he could find a library that would be something to do for the next few hours. It was still better being here then being at lessons. Doors opened and closed. He found bathrooms and bedrooms and a nursery where babies were sleeping soundly. As he opened the last door it got stopped like something was blocking it. He pushed a bit harder and saw books on the ground. Well at least he found the library. Phil continued pushing and edging the door open until he made a space big enough for him to squeeze through.

“I'd appreciate if you didn't step on the books, they are the only ones we have you know,”

A voice spoke making Phil jump. Phil looked into the sunlight room and saw a boy sitting on the floor. He looked older then the rest, but still younger than Phil by at least 4 years. His hair fell in front of his face covering his eyes and was wearing a sweater that was 3 sizes too big for him.

“Well maybe you shouldn't leave them on the floor where people are trying to come in.”

“Maybe I didn't want people coming in, now i've lost my place,” the boy sitting on the floor closed his book. Never once looking up at Phil.

“I was looking for the library,” Phil sighed. This kid was different, he didn't talk to Phil like he was trying to impress him.

“Good job you found it, can you leave now so I can get back to my book,” the kid liked his solitude and this young lord walking in like he owned the place was aggravating him faster then hearing nobles talk about the orphans.

Phil made a face, taken aback by the rudeness of the boy.

“Do you know who I am?” Phil stammered, he never used his status as a threat to peasants before.

The kid shrugged, he didn't know. Honestly didn't care either. Just assumed he was some Lord's kid walking around and picking out who would be the next house maid and he sure as hell was not set on going into some Dukedom to be a worker. He rather stay at the house of Helena for the rest of his life and take care of the kids here.

“I am Philip Lester, second heir to the Lester Dukedom!” Phil exclaimed, shocked by how this child was treating him. Kid's were usually the most respectful.

“Congratulations, I'm Dan something, first Heir to 'I don't give a damn who you are'” The kid tilted his face up slightly. Smirking.

Phil snapped, something about this kid irked him. More then just the blatant disrespect. He stepped forward grabbing Dan by the collar and pushing him into the floor. What his motives were after that. He sure wasn't going to hit a kid, but something about the way Dan spoke to im inccited action in him.

“Get off me you prick!” Dan screamed closing his eyes tightly, his face showing discomfort as the books on the floor pressed into his back.

Dan managed to punch Phil in the stomach giving him enough time to reverse the situation. The younger sat on Phil chest, pinning his arms down and using his body weight to keep the young lord under him. Phil tried to roll over to get Dan off but the younger was in just the right spot.

“What is your problem?” Dan asked looking at the lord he was perched upon.

Phil looked up and for the first time since he met this boy he saw his eyes. It was like a warm autumn sunset. So many shades of carmel and gold reflecting on a crystal sun lake. Phil's mouth fell open slightly to speak.

“You're sitting on me,” Phil stammered.

“You interrupted my reading, that's an unforgivable sin you know,” Dan replied gently.

Phil laughed slightly. That was true. He ended up here because he interrupted this young boy while he was reading. Phil knew how much he hated when he was in the middle of a good book and someone asked him a question.

“Daniel!” A woman's voice shrieked.

Their shouts must have been heard because the small woman from before had managed to get the library door open and she was pulling Dan off Phil's chest. Phil's older brother standing in the doorway in horror struck that it appeared an orphan attacked his younger brother. The woman grabbed Dan's hair yanking his hair back.

“Would you like to punish him my lord, he's yours,” The woman stammered in fear.

Dan looked at Phil without fear, without resentment. His face stone cold till he met Phil's eyes and the corner of his mouth tweaked up. Just a bit. But Phil saw it.

“No, let him go please, it's fine,”

“Are you sure, My lord, would you like me to punish him?” The woman asked Phil, as if maybe Phil did not want to dirty his hand's by slapping an orphan.

“I said let him go please,” Phil's voice was steady and he sounded like an adult for once.

The small woman released Dan's hair and bowed to Phil and the elder brother. Quickly leaving the room.

“You ready to go?” The elder asked.

Phil nodded looking at Dan who had returned to hiding his eyes behind his hair.

“Yes,” Phil said following his brother out of the room.

The two walked outside back toward the carriage where the elders valet was waiting for them.

“I have to return next week after I discuss some thins with our father. The nuns would like to remodel some of the rooms which requires more then just an approval on the budget. You don't have to come back, I know it can be boring but that is just what happens when you get older”

“Can I come back?” Phil interrupted.

“Well sure if you want but it will be just like-”

“I want to come back.”

Phil wanted to talk to Dan again, the kid wasn't afraid of him. He said what was on his mind and didn't censor anything for Phil's sake. It was interesting to say the least. And as always, better than being in lessons.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dan had planted something in Phil's brain. He wasn't sure what, but the whole week Phil kept having fake conversations in his head where he got the last word with Dan. In his head the orphan couldn't outsmart him.

Phil smiled as he burst through the doors, quickly rushing around the orphanage looking for Dan. He checked the library first of course. But the room was empty, cluttered with books, just like last week, but vacant of the boy he was searching for. He moved down the hall to the great room where the kids were playing last week and peeked inside there. Again no sign of Dan. Most of the kids were outside playing, Phil could see them through the window. A few of the young ones were playing with dolls on the floor.

“Hey, can you tell me where Dan is?” Phil said softly squatting down next to the kids.

“He's gone,” One of them replied softly not looking up from her doll.

“Gone? Where did he go?” Phil asked his heart racing, did he get adopted? Surly no one would want that brat.

“I don't know, he just went away,” the girl said again.

Phil stood up trying to collect himself, he could feel his throat tightening. He didn't get a chance to even apologize. Why was he getting so upset. It was an orphanage, children come and go all the time, Dan was no different. However he felt like he just lost someone very close to him.

“Are you guys bothering lord loud mouth?” Dan smiled as he walked into the room.

To his surprise Phil had returned. He wasn't expecting that. It was uncommon to see lords and ladies return to the orphanage. Usually after they found what they were looking for they were gone.

Phil turned around and he couldn't help the way his face lit up when he saw Dan. It felt like the sun just came back.

“Where were you?” Phil demanded, his smile turning into a serious pout. He had gotten upset thinking this boy was gone. Yet there he was. Just as annoying as last week.

“The bathroom? Should I report to you before I urinate, my young lord?” Dan sassed. Intentionally using 'my lord' to make Phil mad.

Phil blushed looking at the ground.

“Well, no, It's none of my business”

Dan walked over to the piano sitting down. He didn't speak any more just let his fingers dance across the keys playing a soft melody. Phil stood still listening to him play, entranced by it. The children stood up and began dancing together as well. Time stopped while Dan played and the room seemed to move in time with the music. The music eased up slowly with no harsh ending and Phil felt as if he was cradled gently out of the trance.

“That was beautiful” Phil whispered.

“Thank you”

“Who wrote that?” it was so lovely, he wanted to hear more.

“I did,” Dan said looking at the keys. Half of him expecting Phil to deny the fact that such a young orphan could write such music.

“I love it” Phil smiled.

It didn't matter how old Dan was or his status. Beautiful music was still beautiful music and Phil could appreciate talent.

“Then it's yours,” Dan replied writing the title of the piece on top of the sheet music. “For Phil”

Phil blushed rushing to the side of the piano grabbing Dan's shoulder.

“No, Dan you can't”

Dan grabbed Phil's wrist and pushed it off of him. He couldn't have him touching him. Dan knew he was a sinner. He preferred the compony of males (although never experiencing it, he knew the thoughts he had of some of the nobles who have come in and out of this orphanage looking for children workers). He didn't want a lord touching him so friendly. It made him feel even more dirty.

“Are you rejecting the song because I am lower than you or because your compliment was empty?” Dan looked up at Phil through his hair.

“Wh-what? Neither, Just, you spent time writing it, and we just met, I don't deserve it” Phil fumbled with his cuff again. There was no reason for him to be so nervous. But the young orphan did manage to pin him down the other day so there was that.

“An apology for last week, sorry for sitting on you but you're still an idiot who needs to shut his mouth” Dan smiled flicking his hair to the side for a moment.

“That's hardly an apology when you word it like that!” Phil laughed pushing Dan's shoulder.

He kept feeling like he wanted to touch Dan. Not sexually, no Dan was just a kid. Hardly even friendly. Just wanted to feel the presence of the person who didn't talk to him like he was better then him, or lower then him, just equal.

“Thank you,” Phil said taking the sheet music.

“Can you play?” Dan asked, looking at Phil's confused face as he stared at the musical notes on the paper.

“Uh, no, not really,” Phil confessed, he had no reason to lie.

“Would you like me to teach you?” Dan was worried how that would come across, a young orphan teaching a young lord music, how shameful. Surely Phil would say no and punish Dan for asking such a thing.

“Hm” Phil made a sound but it didn't sound either like agreement or disagreement.

He backed up and was halfway out the door.

“I'll show you next week! I can do this” Phil smiled waving to Dan as he hurried out to find his brother.

Next week came, the Lester family had agreed to fund building a new library and a new music room for the kids. This allowed Phil to come back while the builders did their work Phil was allowed to do as he pleased.

“Dan! Dan!” Phil exclaimed going into the large room where the older kids played. With the library out of commission Dan didn't have many other rooms to be in.

“May I help you?” Dan turned to face Phil. He did that now, when Phil was talking he turned to look at him. Even if he didn't meet his eyes he could still see his face.

“I can play your song now!” Phil smiled so proud of himself.

“Really? One week and you can play your song now?” Dan scooted over on the piano stool making room for Phil to sit down.

Phil sat and put the music sheet up, then down at the keys, he pressed a couple of them to find where the right one was to begin and slowly but surely made his way through the first line of the song. He was playing, poorly and with no rhythm but he was playing. Dan smiled. It was nice the way Phil treated him. Different from other nobles.

“Well done, you're getting the hang of it” Dan praised Phil.

“Thank you, It doesn't sound as nice as when you did it though... Can you play it for me again?” Phil asked blushing slightly.

“Yes,” Dan nodded and let himself fall into the music again. It felt so natural to him like breathing.

Phil closed his eyes and sighed in content. The music comforting him, it felt loving like the notes were holding him close and stroking his cheek. Again the song ended and the melody gently cradled him back to reality.

“I've made my decision.... I want you to be my personal valet,” Phil said standing up and looking at Dan proudly.

“No thank you”

 


	2. You want your space, I totally understand. I want your space too,

Phil's mouth fell open.

“What do you mean no?”

“I have no desire to be your personal dog, thank you for the offer but no” Dan turned away and went to find one of the books that he had taken from the library before the construction began.

If that was what this came down to, Phil finding a personal servant, would he stop coming by now that Dan declined the offer?

“This is a good deal, You will get to live in a mansion!” Phil grabbed Dan's arm and turned him to look at him.

A little one came up behind Dan tugging at his sweater.

“Dan are ywou gowing away?” she asked looking up at Dan pleading him to stay.

Dan knelt to the floor grabbing the little girls hands. That was right, he had these kid's to look after. Sure the nuns here were kind women and had all the help they needed. But Dan felt like he had to look after them. They needed someone on the inside who they could look up to.

“No i'm not leaving, I told that stupid lord no, didn't you hear me” he smiled petting her head.

Phil pouted. This wasn't the reaction he was expecting at all.

“Are you sure you won't reconsider?” Phil asked one last time, not even convincing himself.

“The answer is no,” Dan said picking up the little one.

The ride home Phil kept pouting and sighing. Acting like a spoiled brat who didn't get his way.

“Something bothering you” Phil's older brother asked, he was going to be coming up every week as well, to monitor the construction.

“The orphan I asked to be my valet declined” Phil huffed and his brother went silent. “I don't get it”

Phil was caught up in his own grumbles he didn't notice the stare his brother had on him.

“You asked an orphan to be your personal servant without consulting your father first?” the elder brother said coldly.

“uh, yeah, it's my servant I can pick whoever I want,” Phil said turning to look at his brother in confusion. He didn't see what the big deal was.

“That is so shameful! You should never have a peasant let alone an orphan as your servant! What would the other lords say!”

“Why should they care?” Phil rolled his eye's he hated always hearing about what others would say about him.

No one cared what he did, he was the second born son. He was the spare. Like an extra button on a jacket, in case one fell off. But normally that never happens. Most people forget the button is there because it is tucked away on the inside of the jacket. Where you can't see it. That was Phil's life, the extra button.

“Don't tell your father about this” the elder brother said meeting Phil's eyes.

“I won't,” Phil sighed and looked out the window again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dan wasn't expecting to see Phil again. Phil had expressed his motives, the offer was declined. There was no more reasoning for Phil to show up. But there he was coming in through the door with his well tailored vest and goofy smile. His blue eyes brightening even more when they saw Dan. He trotted over to the young orphan.

“Daaan,” Phil said in a sing song voice.

Dan looked up at Phil, smiling for a moment.

“You came back,” he said trying to hide the happiness in his voice. But he was happy.

Phil returned for him. That said more then could be put into words. No one came back for orphans, orphans are left behind. But yet there Phil was.

“Well, yeah, I have to show you something,” Phil guided them to the piano and sat down. “Play our song”

Dan looked at Phil for a moment, then did as he was told and began playing, as he has done so many times. Just as the tempo was about to change Phil put his hand on the piano and began playing a new harmony to the song. He had added notes that go into the song that can only be played if you have an extra hand. Dan stopped playing and looked at Phil.

“What are you doing?” He dead panned.

“I've been learning piano and everything I can read about pianos. And I learned that some songs are meant to be played with 2 people. I can't write anything completely new but I added this to the song you wrote.” Phil started rambling, he felt like he did something wrong, maybe it didn't sound that good once it was actually played by someone who knew what he was doing.

“I see,” Dan blushed. Phil was putting forth so much time into him. “Don't you have parties you should be attending or something? Whatever young lords do, wooing women, drinking, getting into trouble”

Phil chuckled softly.

“Maybe,” he looked over at Dan and met his eyes again. “Can you see hidden under your hair?”

“Thats none of your concern” Dan replied. He didn't like when people asked about his sight, he could see just fine, he just didn't want to be seen.

Life was easier that way. Living day to day unseen by the world. It was content, things stayed the same.

“If you say so... wanna try playing our song again? You play your part and don't stop this time okay?”

Dan smiled and turned to the keys. That was new. Phil didn't press the matter at all, just accepted what Dan had said and moved on. It was nice. Almost like friendship.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> remember guys this is all beta stuff atm that im just kinda playin with, im gonna go back and rewrite and edit later. i havent told tumblr about this yet, just a couple of ya on twitter


	3. Looking at you is like looking in a mirror, except I like what I see,

As the months went on Phil continued to show up every week with his brother. While the brother would inspect the progress of the construction, Phil would run off and see Dan. Phil looked forward to these times more than anything else. When he was back at the mansion he was trapped. He wasn't allowed out without a body guard which made adventures through the forest a bit boring when every move he made was monitored and limited.

His only social interactions were during his lessons, and when his mother presented him with a lesser noble to be his personal servant.

“This is Henry Longhurst, he is the 4th son in line in the Longhurst family of nobles, your father and I think he would be a fine valet for you,” Phil's mother spoke calmly looking at her son in anticipation.

“My young lord,” Henry bowed his head to Phil.

“No,” Phil shook his head, he couldn't have someone like that be his personal servant, it needed to be someone he trusted, someone who he felt comfortable around. And not someone who thought Phil was any better than him.

Henry was dismissed and Phil approached his mothers side kneeling down next to her.

“Mother may I have a word with you?” Phil asked his eyes flicking up to her bodyguard.

“Yes of course,” She nodded up to her bodyguard and he left the room.

“I have found someone I want to be my valet,” Phil said cautiously.

“Oh that's wonderful why are we wasting our time then, what family is he from?” Lady Lester asked smiling.

“He doesn't come from a nobel family, he is an orphan at the house of Helena, I met him on my trips with Martin”

His mothers face turned questioning but not as angry as Phil was expecting.

“Well your father is not going to like that,” She said sipping her tea.

“He's what I want though, I trust him,” Phil met his mothers eyes trying to convince her, if he could convince his mother she could convince his father, and his brother would just have to deal.

“Well if you trust him that is your choice, he is going to have to learn etiquette, should I call a teacher for him?” His mother asked kindly.

“It's okay?”

Phil's heart was racing, did he actually have approval from his mother.

“Of course, it's only going to be a burden to you, having a servant that is untrained, and poorly mannered. If you want to go to any events with him I insist on the etiquette lessons.”

“Thank you mother! Oh thank you!” Phil wrapped his arms around her hugging her tightly.

She smiled gently and pet the top of his head.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Phil was excited to tell Dan the good news, Dan could even come home with him tonight if he wanted to. Phil smiled and kept taping his legs inside the carriage.

“You're in a good mood” The elder brother said commenting on Phil's tapping.

Phil just nodded and looked out the window. He still had the matter of Dan had to agree to be his servant. Last time he declined. But they have been friends for months now. There was a chance Dan's opinion could change.

The young lord hurried into the building in search of the young orphan. The little kids no longer were tense when he was in the room. He assumed it was because the way Dan treated him the kids followed his example.

“My lord!” one of the little girls said excitedly and ran up hugging his legs.

Phil bent down and gave her a hug, petting he hair.

“Are you and Dan gonna play the pretty music again?” she asked, and a couple of the other kids came up to him looking expectantly.

“I think we're gonna go on a walk actually,” Phil said looking over at Dan who was reading and didn't bother looking up. But Phil knew Dan heard him and when he was ready would close his book.

“Can we come!” The girl squeeked excitedly.

“I don't think so, this is just gonna be Dan and I okay”

“Alright,” the girl said dejected then turned around to play with the other children again.

Phil sat next to Dan, not disturbing his reading. Phil knew better now. After a few minutes Dan reached the end of his chapter and closed the book setting it on a small table.

“Walk?” Dan asked, stretching as he stood up.

Dan enjoyed Phil's compony, it was nice to have an older kid to hang out with. Dan has been the oldest in the orphanage for quite a few years now. And his lousy attitude with Lords that came by ensured that he stayed there. But as far as lord's went, Phil wasn't half bad.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Phil led them out the back they worked their way into the forrest, following the path made by animals. Wringing his hands a bit nervously. He was much more quite then normal. On their usual walks Phil would be talking non stop, telling Dan about how he is learning piano. Or about events going on that he doesn't want to attend.

“Construction is ending soon” Phil spoke, after construction it would be hard to get to the orphanage to see Dan.

No one would want to escort him down every week, and if his brother wasn't here on buisness there was no urgency for him to be there.

“Yeah, the kids are looking forward to the new library” Dan replied

he had been thinking about that for a while. Once construction was done would that be the end of this friendship they had. Dan knelt down and picked up a rock he stopped walking for a moment to aim and toss it at a tree a few meters ahead of them. It his with a solid thud.

“Nice aim” Phil praised, looking back at Dan who was still standing still.

“Are you going to come back?” Dan asked, he was sure it came out steady but he felt like his head was ringing. Phil was going to leave, he knew it. There was no reason to keep coming back. Dan was no one, non existent, unseen by the world.

“I want you to come with me,” Phil replied swallowing his nerves. “I want you to be my valet”

Dan looked up at Phil tossing his hair out of his eyes for a moment. He couldn't believe Phil still wanted him. Dan was misbehaved, and disagreeable. Bad at conversation and sarcastic. Why would Phil want someone like that for himself.

Out of the corner of his eye Dan saw a shadow and a glint of metal.

“Phil get down!” Dan jumped in front of Phil blocking him with his body as a throwing knife pierced into his shoulder. The young orphan fell forward into Phil's arms.

“Dan!” Phil screamed.

He couldn't lose this person. The first person who didn't look down on him or up to him. His friend and equal. The wound didn't look fatal being in the back of his shoulder, but it was deep. If Dan didn't block him it would have gone right into Phil's heart...

Phil didn't pull the knife out in fear Dan might bleed out if he did.

“Dan, stay with me come on we have to go back,” Phil said panicked.

Dan opened his eyes and looked up at Phil. He didn't know why he did it. His gut reaction was to protect Phil. Maybe he wouldn't be such a bad servant after all. Dan coughed and began crying in pain. He felt lightheaded.

Phil moved to try and lift Dan.

“Don't move my arms, it hurts,” Dan cried when Phil tried to lift him.

“You're going to have to hold on with your legs then, come on we can't stay here” Phil scooped the young boy up by his bottom and Dan wrapped his legs around Phil's waist, leaning onto Phil's shoulder.

“You're not like the other nobles,” Dan mumbled as they walked. He was trying so hard to stay conscious but the searing pain in his shoulder made him want to sleep.

“You protected me,” Phil said softly

“Yeah, I did didn't I” Dan smiled and closed his eyes.

He protected someone important to him. That was a first. He never had anyone important to protect before.

When Dan woke up he was in a hospital bed. A throbbing pain in his shoulder still but he would live. He sat up slowly looking around, this didn't look like any of the medical wards he had been in before when he was sick.

The door to the room began to creak open a bit and slowly and quietly Phil entered the room. Dan was tense but noticing the familiar compony he relaxed.

“Hi,” Dan said simply.

“Dan!” Phil ran to Dans side and threw his arms around him. “i was so worried, what were you thinking! You idiot!”

Dan smiled to himself and wrapped his arms around Phil, this was the first hug he had from someone that wasn't one of the orphan kids.

“It's a servants duty to protect their master,” Dan replied burring his face into Phil's shoulder.

“I hate you” Phil laughed holding tightly to Dan.

Dan didn't want to think about why Phil was important to him. They were friends sure, but Dan knew the other thoughts he had about the older boy. When he was laying in bed he would imagine Phil crawling in on top of him. So many sins, Dan was only 15, although common for lords and ladies to get engaged at 15, usually they were both minors. Phil was 19. Then there was status, for a young lord to touch an orphan so intimately would be the biggest disgrace to the family. And finally they were both boys. It happened among nobel families but it wasn't honored. Usually the homosexual family member was treated as an outcast. But if Dan kept the thoughts to himself and remain by Phil's side it would be enough.

“Where am I?” Dan asked bringing himself out of his thoughts.

“This is the Lester family medical ward, I wanted to make sure you were close by so I insisted after they treated you they relocated you,” Phil pulled away and sat on the bed.

“I'm in your mansion... but wait I haven't said bye to the kids yet, I can't just leave like that! I need to see them” Dan started moving to get up. He did just agree to be Phil's servant but he didn't mean that very second. How would the kids feel if he just disappeared.

“Relax, we'll go back, you aren't a prisoner Dan, you can go visit any time you want, and you can leave any time you want. Theres no contract, only your word and loyalty to me,”

“Thank you, Phil,” Dan relaxed into the bed. He closed his eyes for a moment and heard Phil standing up. Next he felt lips gently press against his forehead.

“I'll let you sleep,” Phil whispered softly pushing Dan's hair aside.

The kiss felt nice, Dan hadn't been shown affection like that since he was much younger. The nuns didn't think a 15 year old boy appreciated being tucked into bed and kissed goodnight. But still, the affection felt warm.

“Did they catch him?” Dan asked, his eyes peaking open. “The guy who threw the knife?”

Phil blinked, he had not given it much thought. Such a highly regarded family like the Lesters were used to such attacks. Phil had even been kidnapped before. That is why they had body guards usually.

“I don't think so, but don't worry they were after me, not you” Phil smiled gently as if that was supposed to comfort Dan.

“Then stay here,” Dan reached out and grabbed Phil's shirt. “I can't protect you if I'm not by your side”

Phil nodded gently and sat down on the bed again.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> all these chapters are so short atm, i think they are kinda more like outlines, when i go back and rewrite there will probably be more detail and thoughts


	4. You and I will never be a great love story. Maybe we can be fantasy

Dans fingers fumbled as he played with the ribbon in his hand, he had been taking etiquette lessons. As well as lessons in a servants duties. But he hadn't gotten the hang of it yet. It wasn't the act itself, he knew how to swiftly put a shirt on someone and button it up. Tie a ribbon on someones neck, and fix their cuffs. But when he was so close to Phil and performing these actions onto Phil. It became a whole different ordeal.

“Relax, it's okay, take your time, you'll get the hang of it,” Phil said reaching his hand up to gently touch Dan's hand as he met his eyes.

Dan refused to let Phil cut his hair, but when they were this close physically he couldn't hide away completely. It had been 3 months since Dan had moved in and began his lessons. With Phil's mother keeping the family in line, Dan was able to be by Phil's side without much huff from the household. That didn't stop the noblewomen from gossiping at every event. Phil hated it, as long as in public Dan dressed and acted the part then what did it matter to them.

“Or maybe you could just dress yourself,” Dan snapped as he finished tying the ribbon.

Phil leaned down and wrapped his arms around Dan's waist lifting him slightly so Dan had to stand on his tippy toes. Phil always gave Dan hugs when they were alone and Dan was not complaining one bit. Dan wrapped his arms around Phil's neck as he stretched up.

“You know soon I'm gonna have a growth spurt, and once I'm taller then you you wont be able to pick me up,” Dan smiled appreciating this contact.

“Oh yeah? We will see about that,” Phil laughed lowering Dan back to the ground.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Every morning Dan was the first person who would walk into Phil's room to wake him. And at night he was the last person Phil saw before he went to sleep. Dan was always by Phil's side except for when Dan had his private lessons with the tutor. Despite all the lessons in manors and how to talk to your master, Dan never changed his ways. And Phil wouldn't have that any other way. He put on the appearance. When they were at social gatherings, Dan would look the part. He wouldn't open his mouth or draw attention to himself. But once the doors were closed Dan was as he always is.

One cold night in the middle of winter, the snow outside was beating against the window harder than ever. The first real snow storm of the year. Phil always had trouble sleeping during snow storms. Slowly the door to his bedroom opened silently and soft feet padded inside the room.

“Phil?” Dan's voice was heard in the dark room.

Phil jumped not expecting to hear his young servant in the middle of the night.

“Yeah?” Phil responded, exhausted, but restless.

“I uh, had a bad dream,” Dan squeaked, a bit embarrassed. But he was in a huge mansion for the first time. There were bound to be nights where he didn't feel safe.

Phil sat up to look at the young boy.

“You wanna come sleep with me?” Phil asked patting the large amount of bed next to him.

Dan didn't need a second invitation, he instantly moved forward crawling over phil into the bed.

“Better?” Phil asked laying back down.

“hmmhm” Dan made a noise of agreement but was already falling back asleep now that he was with Phil.

Phil leaned down and kissed Dan's forehead.

“Goodnight,”

That was the beginning of Dan sleeping in Phil's bed. Something about the other person being right there made them both feel that much more comfortable.

As time passed Dan did begin to grow taller, age 17 Dan was now only 2 inches shorter than Phil. He learned how to compose himself when he was bathing Phil and helping him dress. Or maybe he had lost the feelings.

Phil was sitting on his chair in his bedroom reading when he came to a very romantic part in the story. The lead boy just confessed his feelings to the lead girl, she jumps up into his arms as they embrace and kiss passionately. Phil bit at his lip and looked up to see his servant sitting on the other side of the room buried in a book.

“Have you ever kissed anyone Dan?” Phil asked setting his book down.

Dan liked the way their friendship worked, they were both at ease just sitting in the same room. Even fi they didn't talk there was never an awkward silence. Until Phil asked that question. Dan swallowed trying to seem unfazed.

“I have not,” Dan replied, re reading the same line over and over again. Of course Dan hadn't kissed anyone.

“Seriously!” Phil exclaimed walking over to Dan. He could hardly believe such a good looking guy like Dan had never been kissed. “Not even one of the maids?”

Dan pushed his book up higher to hide.

“It's not a big deal or anything, kissing is stupid” Dan muttered. It wasn't like Dan didn't wan't to kiss anyone, it was that there was no one who would kiss him. Dan liked boys, and out of the boys Dan would be interested in kissing, none of them were gay.

“How would you know, you've never been kissed” Phil teased.

Phil wasn't exactly an expert himself, but he had fooled around with some girls at the nobel parties. He was an heir to a dukedom, there were plenty of girls fawning over him trying to make him fall in love so they could raise the status of their own family. It was selfish on both parts, Phil used them for the physical intimacy, they were using him for status. Over the past 2 years though Phil has hardly noticed any of the girls at parties. He began spending all of his time chatting with Dan instead. He preferred it over the girls, with Dan there was no hidden motives.

“Whats so special about being kissed anyway?” Dan blushed.

Dan knew what was special, he longed for it. The feeling of someone else's lips pressed against his, the way his tongue would gently brush along their lip and taste the other person. But that was what he could never have. Boy's don't kiss boy's. That was that.

Phil pouted at Dan and pulled the book away, he picked the book mark up off the floor marking Dan's place -He knew better than to lose Dan's spot- and set the book on top of the book shelf. Dan snapped back for his book but let his master take it from him.

“What was that for?” Dan asked giving Phil a dirty look.

“Stand up,” Phil gestured for Dan to stand.

Dan did as he was told and flopped his hands out to say 'now what'.

“I want you to kiss me” Phil said looking at Dan's eyes.

He did not want his servant to not have experience in this sort of thing. And if Phil was honest it would help him let out some of the sexual frustration he had inside right now after reading that book just minutes ago.

Dan's stomach jumped to his throat and he could feel his heart beat in his ears. He could not believe Phil, his master, had just asked him to kiss him.

“Wh-what?” Dan stammered, his eyes widening as he tried to make sense.

“I, want, you, to kiss me....it's an order,” Phil added, very rarely did he add that something was an order. Whenever Dan did not want to do something he would express why and Phil would agree that it was stupid and they would move on.

“I don't think that's-”

Dan was in the middle of speaking when Phil had leaned forward and crashed their lips together. Dan's heart was beating so fast he thought it might explode. His mouth fell open slightly as he gasped.

Phil grabbed Dan's wrist pinning him to the wall. He took the opportunity when Dan opened his mouth to push his tongue inside briefly. Phil wasn't a sloppy kisser in the slightest. He used his tongue skillfully without making the kiss messy. Phil released Dan's wrist and pushed open Dan's jacket, running his hands up Dan's sides.

Dan shuddered under Phil's hands, he let out a soft moan as he brought Phil's lower lip between his and sucked on his gently. His arms found their way up and around Phil's neck. Kissing was a million times better than he ever imagined it could be. He had read about kissing too many times to count, but the words could never compare to how it felt to actually be doing it.

Phil broke the kiss to breath, he continued kissing along Dan's jaw.

“You said you've never done this before” Phil teased, his hands worked down feeling up Dan's butt. Phil had always been grabby when he kissed, he liked to feel every bit of the person.

“I haven't” Dan moaned jerking his hips forward into Phil's when he felt Phil's hands on him.

Dan could feel his pants getting tighter and his face flushed. What was he supposed to do with that!

“Phil... I” Dan started to speak but Phil reconnected their lips and lifted Dan up. Dan wrapped his legs around Phil's waist moaning again feeling Phil pressed against his pelvis. “Oh god!”

Dan felt so dirty, he couldn't believe what he was doing, but it felt too good.

Phil rolled his hips instinctively, letting out soft sighs as he felt the pleasure as he felt Dan's motions responding to his. Phil used the wall for support and moved his hands up to tug at the ribbon on Dan's neck. Roughly fumbling with the buttons to try and expose Dan's neck. The second that smooth golden skin was exposed Phil's mouth was on it, kissing, and biting as his servant let out beautiful sounds of satisfaction.

Dan's hands gripped at the back of Phil's jacket trying to calm himself down. He needed it to stop before he lost himself. Phil on his neck was making his head feel light. Suddenly Dan's body felt as if all the tension was released. Dan let out a loud yelp as his body felt limp.

“Phil” Dan whimpered.

Phil pulled back looking at his friend with concern.

“Hey, you alright?” He asked supporting Dan so he could lower his legs.

Dan looked like he was about to cry, he was so embarrassed. He had just come in his pants from the feeling of his master pressed against him. Dan wiped his eyes and swallowed the lump in his throat. He didn't speak again just fixed up his collar to the best of his ability and moved away from Phil. Not once for the rest of the evening looking at him.

Dan worked so hard all these years to keep these feelings for Phil contained and now Phil just brought those feelings to something real, and physical. Dan didn't want any part of that.

That night Dan went back to his own bedroom, the same for the next day, and the rest of the week. Phil didn't really understand what happened. It seemed like Dan was into it while it was happening. The whole week Dan avoided Phil as much as he could. He asked for extra lessons, only meeting with Phil to help him get dressed and undressed and serve him meals. He didn't even help him bathe as he usually did. Just made an excuse about having an extra lesson to get to.

Phil had enough, there was no excuse for the way Dan was avoiding him. It was like they were hardly friends anymore.

Dan came into the room to help Phil get undressed for the night as he always did. While he was working his way down with the buttons Phil grabbed Dan's arm and pulled him onto the bed pinning him down.

Dan pulled away trying to make himself smaller and just coil himself up.

“No Phil let me go” Dan whined bringing his legs up to his chest as he tried to curl away.

“Why are you avoiding me now, talk to me!” Phil demanded, Holding Dan's hands down with one arm he used the other to try and turn dan to face him. “Did you not like kissing me? It's fine I wont make you do it again, just talk to me, I don't know what is wrong if you wont talk!”

Dan stopped struggling and just began crying. Huge tears pouring down his cheek as he was overcome with a wave of emotions.

“You're my master!” Dan cried, sniffling.

“You never cared about status before” Phil said softly releasing Dan's wrists.

“I'm your servant, you shouldn't kiss me, I'm your male servant!” Dan covered his eyes trying to stop the tears but they kept coming.

“Hey, come here, it's alright” Phil put Dan's legs on either side of his waist and pulled Dan up to hug him. “It's alright, you're okay”

Phil tried his best to comfort Dan. Phil didn't even think about the face they were both boys. It never crossed his mind, Phil was just kissing the person he thought was beautiful. He had deep feelings for Dan. Dan was the most important person to him, the person he would die for, the person he lives for. He didn't think too much on it, but his actions earlier in the week did bring out something. He was physically attracted to Dan. So what did that mean.

Dan sniffled and wrapped his arms around Phil's shoulders.

“Dan, I...” Phil wasn't sure how to express his feelings for Dan. How to explain all his thoughts in a few words. “I love you” That was it, that explained it, the person he put above all else. That was the feelings. He never really felt like that for anyone before. Dan never lied to him, or had ulterier motives, everything with Dan was always out in the open. He always expressed how he was feeling, he was what Phil had always been looking for.

Dan buried his face into Phil's neck. He knew Phil was telling the truth. Phil never lied to him. He just didn't think it was right, it was the worst choice Phil could make. Only going to end with disappointment when Phil realized he has duties to carry out as a lord.

“Let me finish getting you ready for bed” Dan mumbled pulling away.

Dan sighed and undressed Phil, appreciating his body as he always did. Dan was always professional when he did his duties. But some days he wished when that beautiful pale chest was exposed to him he could lean forward and leave a trail of kisses on the skin. With that thought he smiled and leaned forward gently placing a soft kiss upon Phil's chest. Nothing more. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i need to figure myself out and figure out what im doing with this, just so you guys know when i rewrite this properly it may end up looking completely different xDDD


	5. If you don't have anything nice to say, throw something,

Dan ran his hands down Phil's bare chest. The wet skin gliding smoothly under his fingers. Phil let out a soft sigh, his head rocking back as he let the feeling come over him.

“D-dan” Phil moaned as Dan's hands worked over his shoulders. Massaging him so carefully.

He reached his hand up to hold onto Dan's arm.

“Yeah?” Dan asked leaning closer to Phil to hear him speak.

“I'm ready to get out”

Dan stood up and grabbed a towel off the counter, bringing it over to his master who was sitting in the bathtub. Phil took the towel and wrapped it around his waist,

“Thank you” Phil stroked Dan's cheek gently as he walked past him and into the bedroom.

He sat on the bed waiting for Dan to come dress him. There was a party tonight. Phil's 22nd birthday party to be exactly. There were many ladies from all over the country coming for a chance to meet Phil and court him.

Dan grabbed a smaller towel.

“Have to dry your hair too, Phil” Dan said tossing the towel to Phil.

He didn't like these events, seeing women clawing all over Phil. It was frustrating. Dan made a small huff and went to the closet to find Phil an outfit for the evening. Dan loved the way lords and ladies dressed. Their clothing always looked so neatly decorated. He pulled out a dress shirt, vest and jacket that fell to about mid thigh. Dan hated some of the tasks he had to do for Phil. Sometimes he forgot why he put up with this. When he walked back over Phil had dried his hair and was pulling up a pair of boxers. Dan managed to catch a glimpse of the pale skin of Phil's butt before it was covered by fabric. Oh yeah, that was why. Dan was unarguably in love with Phil. And he hated it. There was nothing more frustrating in the world than the way Phil made him feel. All the nights Dan lied awake restless, thinking about the beautiful man sleeping next to him. How good he felt pressed against him.

They haven't had an interaction like that since that one time. Thankfully though, Phil had not withdrawn all affection. He still kissed Dan's head goodnight, and still stole hugs when they were alone.

Phil stood up as Dan helped him with his clothing on. He loved how close the younger boy was when he helped phil button his shirt up. Phil inhaled through his nose and could smell the sea salt scent that was Dan. It was so difficult to not pin Dan into the bed and ravish him right then and there. But phil would never do anything that Dan didn't want, he already upset him once.

Dan put his arms on Phil's shoulders while he fixed his collar.

“You excited for tonight?” Dan asked finishing up the scarf and putting a pin on it.

“hm, I guess” Phil looked up at Dan, he reached his hand up and pushed Dan's hair aside. “You should let me cut your hair.”

Dan stepped back, moving toward the dresser to get Phil's cufflinks.

“It's fine, don't bother with it,” Dan tilted his head forward to hide his eyes more.

Phil's face fell as Dan fumbled with his cuffs and stepped back.

“Ready?” Dan asked. He had to put on his professional face now. When he went downstairs with Phil they had the appearance to keep up. Dan was a loyal servant to the respected Phil Lester. Nothing more.

They walked down the stairs together. Dan silent as he always was before these events. Dan put his hand on the door handle to open it for Phil.

“Dan,” Phil said putting his hand on Dan's before the door was opened. He wanted to say a lot of things. Let him know how he wishes he could be dancing with him tonight, and hold him close. But the words caught in his throat as he looked into Dan's eyes and saw the hurt behind them.

Dan stayed silent. He had no say in these sort of things.

“I love you” Phil whispered, it was barely audible. But he leaned forward and kissed Dan's cheek ever so gently.

Dan's face flushed as he pulled away from Phil. If they were caught, Dan would be the one punished.

“Ready?” Dan asked again. His face still read as he looked at his master.

“As i'll ever be” Phil smiled at Dan.

He hoped that would be enough to help Dan through the night. Phil knew Dan didn't like these, but there wasn't much he could do on that. Phil had to attend, he had to dance with women out of respect to the house holds. He always tried his best to give Dan as much attention as he could at these. It wasn't his fault Dan was needy.

As Dan opened the door and Phil walked inside they were greeted with much applause and cheering. Dan walked a few paces behind Phil as nobles approached Phil and shook his hand, praised him for growing up. That never made sense, people congratulating you on being one day closer to death. Dan rolled his eyes as they made their way to the dinner table.

That was something Dan really liked about these parties. Being able to sit and share a meal with Phil. Valets were permitted to sit next to their master, the food was served by the normal housemaids and extra hired staff. It was generally a way of showing respect to the noble houses that the valets had come from. Dan on the other hand did not come from any noble house, he just was lucky.

Phil ran his hand gently along Dan's leg under the table. He didn't mean anything by it, but he was feeling overwhelmed with all the people and needed Dan to keep him stable.

Dan tensed up, Phil probably had no idea the affect his actions had on Dan. Dan moved his leg to shake Phil off and leaned up to Phil's ear.

“Can I help you with something?” Dan whispered.

A light blush covered Phil's cheeks.

“No, sorry, just a bit anxious,” Phil tried smiling at Dan but it didn't meet his eyes.

“Why? Everyone here loves you,”

“Including you?” Phil asked.

Dan swallowed. Of course he loved Phil. But admiting it outloud would be too much.

Dinner carried on, Dan had to remember to keep his manners while eating. Back at the orphanage they were fed decently and it wasn't horrible. But it could never compare to the food he received now he was at the mansion. Dan didn't even know food could taste this good.

After dinner there was a small rest where people talked to the others at their table. Once everyones stomachs had a chance to digest and the tables were cleared the ochestra came out to play. If Phil had a date, they would get the first dance. However because he did not, and was not keen to let any of the noble ladies feel less important then the next. The dance began all at once and Phil would stand on the side with his friend, sipping wine and discussing piano.

Dan put his hand on Phil's lower back as he guided him over to the wine table.

“My lord!” a lady's voice spoke.

Phil turned around to see Lady Caroline Gosling approching him with a smile. She curtsied as she got closer to him.

“My lady Caroline,” Phil said bowing in response.

He knew her family, they were a kind bunch. Caroline was the second oldest. She had an older brother who was head of the family and then they had 2 younger siblings. Caroline had been one of Phil's tricks before. It was nothing to him, just kissing a pretty girl. But she had not givven up on the hope that maybe she could get Phil to fall for her.

“I was hoping if you could be so kind to grace me with a dance this evening,” She smiled kindly. She was a beautiful girl with strawberry blonde hair falling gently to her shoulders.

“Thank you my lady, I'd be honored,” Phil smiled an empty smile to her. Not that any of the nobles ever knew the difference.

Phil thought that if he got dancing out of the way early he would be able to get out of it the rest of the night.

Dan stepped back, this was the part he hated. He wanted to wrap his arms around Phil's waist, tell the girl to back off and leave his Phil alone. Yet he had to watch as Phil walked off with a noble woman.

“You're making that face” One of the maids said scooting next to him. Mary was Dan's age, but had been there much longer than him. Her parents had sold her directly to the Lester family. In return her family was given a sum of money, and also free of their taxes for a year.

It was worth it, now Mary had a job for life, a nice place to sleep, and was always fed.

“What face?” Dan retorrted, trying to act like he had no idea what she ment.

“Oh my master is paying attention to girls and not me, i'm gonna pout all evening” She said mocking his voice.

Dan folded his arms. He didn't want to put up with her teasing.

“resorting to arm folding so quickly?” she grabbed Dan's arm and shook till he uncrossed them. “loosen up, he isn't going to find a wife if you are attached to his hip”

That was it Dan couldn't take it anymore.

“Shut up!” Dan shouted, and pulled his hand back to smack her. He stopped in time before hitting her. But now the whole room was looking at him.

The room stopped and looked at Dan. Phil felt a tightning in his stomach from embarresment.

“My lady i'm sorry I need to talk to my servant” Phil stepped away striding over to Dan.

He grabbed Dan's arm and started tugging him out of room.

“Phil let go!” Dan shouted in the hallway as Phil dragged him to a vacent room.

They ended up in the library. Phil pushed Dan inside closing the door behind him.

“What the hell is your problem!” Phil scolded as Dan walked away from him.

Dan had acted out. Phil's dad was always trying to find reasons why Dan was a bad servant and when he did things like that he was in danger of being taken away. Dan didn't answer just kept walking away through the book shelves. He wasn't ready to talk about it.

“Dan, answer me when I'm talking to you” Phil followed Dan through the empty vast library. “This is an order, answer your master, why did you hit one of the maids!”

Dan rolled his eyes and huffed loudly.

“I didn't hit her, _my lord,_ I shouted at her,” Dan exagurated the title. He turned around and mock bowed to him. “Anything else I can help you with, _master_ , would you like me to apologize to the tramp you were dancing with.”

“You are not to speak of Lady Caroline in that manor!” Phil tried to put more athority into his voice, but Dan never listened to him anyway.

“Why not!” Dan grabbed a book off the shelf and threw it at Phil. Not exactly aiming to hit him, Dan couldn't bring himself to do that. But he had to express something. “If you like her so much why don't you just marry her!”

Dan threw another book.

“What are you even talking about you are over reacting about nothing!” Phil threw a book at Dan too. Same as Dan though, not aiming to make contact. “I was dancing with her for all of 3 minnutes”

“But you've been with her before haven't you! Phil I know about it, I know you fool around with girls every party, I know you have to get married and Lady Caroline is beautiful, just don't pretend like you love me when you know damn well that's not true” Dan dropped the book he was holding and covered his eyes.

He hated that Phil brought out all these emotions, he never had them before but now every action Phil did just tugged on every heart string. Dan sunk to the floor covering his face, now he felt embaressed that he was crying over all this.

Phil swallowed and looked at his slumped over servant. He never felt like he was pretending with Dan. Dan was the one person that he felt like he didn't have to pretend at all. The person he felt like he could tell them he loved.

“Dan, I...I do love you,” Phil said taking a few steps closer to Dan at risk of being hit with a book.

“No you don't, not the way I do, you can't...” Dan sniffled. It didn't even matter if Phil did love Dan, he couldn't, not when he had a status to uphold. What would happen when Phil was expected to marry a woman. “You can't see me that way”

“Now you're telling me what to do just like everyone else” Phil was sick of it, He grabbed Dan's arm and pulled him up bringing him to him in a tight hug. “Dan I am in love with you, that is just something you and everyone else is going just just have to accept. It's fine if you don't want to kiss me, or share a bed with me anymore, I don't care but I won't be told by anyone who I have feelings for.”

Dan wrapped his arms around Phil, he couldn't resist, he loved the feeling of Phil pressed against him. He could feel Phil's heartbeat and closed his eyes taking in the most glorious sound in the world. The beating heart of the person who loved him. Dan never knew such a sound could be so comforting.

“I'm sorry”

“Me too”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel like this novel has a lot of potential if i can figure out what the story arc is, this is still a beta guys im letting you read it but remember i may change everything about it by the time i get it finished


	6. When I look at you all I can see are the mistakes we're going to make

A soft breeze blew in through the window. The sweet smell of a cool spring day in the air. It was not fair to be inside on a day like this. Phil leaned out the window, his body leaning forward. The ground was such a long ways away. If he lost footing he would surely fall. All he could see out the window was an empty field leading into the dense forest. The bedroom door clicked open and Phil pulled himself back inside to see his beautiful young servant entering the room. New book in hand.

Dan was always happy to just read for hours. But Dan had never been trapped like Phil was. If Dan wanted to he could walk right out the door, go for a walk, go to the market, go to the stables. Phil could never do that. Especially now, they had captured an attempted assassin. The intel they received from him told them that there were more assassins still out there. It was too dangerous for Phil to be permitted to leave. That didn't stop Phil from trying of course.

“Let's go for a walk in the woods,” Phil suggested, hoping that it would sound commanding so Dan would forget that Phil was not allowed to leave the mansion.

Dan sighed, he wished they could. He could feel Phil going stir crazy.

“You know we can't, Phil” Dan said walking over to Phil near the window.

Dan set his book on the small table as he stepped closer to the window and slowly put his hand into Phil's. Intertwining their fingers. Their relationship had become innocently more intimate, although there was nothing innocent about a lord being so close to his male servant. When alone they would hold hands, and occasionally Dan had received pecks on the lips from Phil. Those always made his stomach flip.

“Step away from the window, it's dangerous,” Dan said tugging his masters hand.

Phil huffed and followed, sitting in his plush chair at the table. However he did not let go of Dan's hand. Dan tugged slightly trying to pull away and Phil smiled up at Dan mischievously.

“Dan come here” Phil cooed pulling Dan around front of the chair.

Dan rolled his eyes and stood in front of Phil. It took him a second before he looked down into those beautiful blue eyes staring up at him. Those eyes that had the ability to look at him and just control his every thought. Making all of his wants be to just make the person attached to such beautiful eyes happy.

“Let's go on a walk, we wont go far, and I'll have you with me” Phil charmed Dan, with a soft gentle voice.

Phil was on the verge of just making a prison escape down the window. Tie up some bed sheets and walk down the side of the wall. However he would prefer if he had his friend with him. Dan looked away, trying to resist just giving Phil what he wanted. He made a loud frustrated sigh.

“Alright, but I'm not jumping in front of any more knives for you, I'll just let your sorry ass die this time” Dan caved. It really was not as dangerous as the guards made it out to be, he was in no more danger than he was last week when they caught this assassin.

Phil's mouth dropped open.

“That was years ago! It's not like you had to protect me,” Phil whined.

Dan smirked backing away to grab his sweater off the back of his chair opposite the table from Phil.

“Yeah, well I still have the scar,” Dan teased. “my skin would be blemish free if I never met you”

He never regretted saving Phil that day. And he knew that Phil knew that too. Phil stood up and stepped behind Dan wrapping his arms around his waist and burying his face into Dan's neck.

“Thank you,” Phil purred, nuzzling into the warm skin making Dan flinch away from the tickles.

Dan hid his face away from Phil as he smiled, the comfort he felt when Phil gave him affection made his heart flutter and his stomach go warm.

“Let's go then, only for an hour okay?” Dan pulled away still smiling.

 

They snuck down the stairs and out the back door, through the stables. Avoiding the house staff like criminals on the run. They made a run into the forest. Phil relaxed once they were hidden by the trees. Getting back would be easier, even if they did get scolded at least they would have already had their fun outside.

The forest was much darker than Dan remembered it. The trees seemed to shade the sun from leaking onto their skin. Phil had already started making his way ahead of Dan. There was no set path from the way they had entered, but if they kept walking forward they expected they would find one.

“Phil wait a sec!” Dan called out he started to run but immediately tripped. Falling face first into the ground.

Phil chuckled at the sight of his fallen friend.

“Are you alright,” Phil called out walking back to help the young man up. “Never knew you were so graceful”

“S-shut up,” Dan blushed, but accepted Phil's help.

Dirt was now sticking to his knees and Dan sighed at the thought of having to clean the mess he had made. He could go into the stables a million names and never get dirty, but a short walk with Phil and he already has dirt stains to scrub out.

“Let's go,” Phil stepped backwards not even stumbling slightly.

Phil had been training how to use a one handed sword in battle, his progress showed in the way he walked. Phil always stepped with purpose and never lost footing. He was starting to look more and more like the young lord he was. In contrast to Dan who seemed to have grown taller but not learned how to control his much longer limbs.

The farther they got out the more tense Dan got. He had thought they would have hit the path by now. Unless hey had entered at the wrong angle and were heading the complete opposite direction.

“Phil, let's turn back,” Dan called out to his master who from being trapped in his room all week was walking fast so was still farther ahead.

If Phil heard, he was choosing to ignore what Dan had said because he kept moving forward. There was an unsettling rustling in trees. Dan stopped moving and listened. What was the sound? He heard it again, it was ahead of him low to the ground. Dan closed his eyes for a brief moment cutting off his sight so he could listen to the soft noises in the forest. There were no birds tweeting. Dan heard another squish of soft earth under foot and breathed in through his nose. That smell was recognizable, his eyes they shot open and he rushed forward.

“Phil wait! I think theres-!” As Dan shouted and Phil turned back to see what his servant was shouting about, a large grey wolf leaped from the trees. Lunging at Phil

Dan felt the world freeze in his mind, there was no chance he could ever make it to Phil in time. He was going to lose him. No, he couldn't, he wouldn't allow it.

Dan stamped his foot hard into the ground as he extended his arms as if to push the wolf away from his beloved.

“No!” and as Dan shouted energy moved through the soles of his feet up through his legs and torso, burning every bit of his body as it moved through him. He felt the burst of energy shoot out through the palm of his hand out his finger tips. The energy knocked the wolf back, sending it flying across the forest into a tree.

Dan shook, immobilized by fear, staring at the wolf as it lifted itself back up. It looked over at Dan for a moment before whimpering as it ran off. The other wolves hiding among the trees fled too and Dan was stood with his arms outstretched, shaking. He couldn't make sense of what just happened.

It looked like magic. Dan had been reading about magic a lot lately. As he made his way through the Lester families library he found history books about magic. Magic used to be a skill passed down through generations of noble families. As generations went on, the gene became less and less common till it eventually died out. No one has used magic in generations.

Phil ran over to Dan's side, his hands lowering Dan's arms then cupping Dan's face.

“How did you do that!” Phil shouted trying to bring Dan back from his thoughts.

Dan remained frozen, his lip quivering.

“I-I don-” Dan shook, his eyes wide and scared. Would Phil tell his father, what would happen then? Would any one believe Phil, Would Dan be taken away? These thoughts bounced around inside Dan's head uncontrollably only causing the shakes to increase.

Phil felt the boy trembling under his hands.

“Hey, wait, relax you're okay, we're okay see, you made the bad wolf go away, we're alright, let's go home okay,” Phil's voice became calm despite how shocked he was. Shouting would not do them any good now.

Could it be possible that his orphan valet carried the noble gene of magic?

Dan nodded and stepped backwards. Again stumbling, this time Phil caught him.

“I've got you,” Phil whispered his arm around Dan's waist.

 

When they got back inside they were caught by one of the maids. As they both were back unharmed she let them go.

They hurried up the stairs to Phil's room. Phil closed and locked the door behind them. Rushing across the room to close the window. Dan still remained frozen, he could feel the tingling in his fingers. It felt like he had touched a hot kettle, they burned.

“Dan?” Phil asked stepping forward with caution.

Dan's head jerked up and he looked at Phil who appeared afraid of him. His stomach sunk, Phil would hate him.

“It wasn't me! I didn't do it, I swear! Phil It wasn't me!” Dan knelt down bowing to his master.

“Dan, no, I want to know, _how_ you did it” Phil took slow steps toward the young man. He was not afraid Dan would hurt him. Dan would never do that. He was just afraid Dan was afraid. An empathetic fear.

Dan shook, his fingers still burned, it felt like they were getting hotter and hotter.

“I don't know, I just wanted to protect you,” Dan kept looking at the ground. “I was too far away, the wolf was going to hurt you”

Phil knelt down in front of Dan, placing his hand to his shoulder.

“Dan, it's okay, it's just me here, was that magic?” Phil asked, his voice oddly steady. But Phil knew he was using all his strength to put on a show of courage for the sake of his friend.

Dan nodded, not that he had ever seen magic performed before. No one had. But Dan could feel it, he had read about it, seen drawings depicted of warlocks performing a deflecting spell. No one ever said anything about the burning.

“M-my hands burn” Dan mumbled.

“Burn?” Phil grabbed Dan's hand turning it over, no burn marks. “Here?”

Phil pressed his finger tip gingerly to Dan's palm. Dan let off a soft sigh as his eyes fluttered closed, it felt soothing. Dan grabbed Phil's hands and closed his eyes as the burning cooled. His hands shot up and cupped Phil's cheeks, the relief from the burning was almost instant.

Dan opened his brown eyes and looked back at Phil.

“What am I?” Dan asked pulling away.

“You are Dan, my best friend, my valet, nothing more okay?” Phil stood up and walked to the table near their chairs. His eyes fell upon the book that Dan had set down earlier.

_Defensive Magic Theory: Beyond Deflecting_. Dan must have finished the first one. It was hard to believe someone could be as smart and talented as Dan was. He didn't have anyone forcing him to study, it was just what he liked to do.

“Dan?” Phil smiled back at Dan as the young man was standing up. “I'd like to talk about what you've read about magic.”

There was silence, Dan sat opposite Phil in the chairs near the window. The surge of power Dan had felt was gone now.

“Explain this to me” Phil tapped the book on the table.

“It's nothing, I was just reading” Dan spoke softly but clearly.

“No, not excuses, I want you to explain magic to me” Phil stared deep into Dan's eyes. Phil knew some stuff, he knew that magic was real, but ancient. It was passed down through genetics and it wasn't a dominant gene. Eventually it just died out.

“I read about the history of magic, you know, genetics,” Dan started talking, he didn't need to fear Phil. “and about defensive magic, I just thought it was interesting. The simple stuff is controlled through will power, more advanced spells are through incantations and potions.”

Phil nodded taking in what Dan was telling him. It wasn't hard to believe. Just shocking, his very own servant carried the magic gene.

“Wow, how long have you known?” Phil asked leaning forward.

“I didn't,”

Phil looked out the window.

“You saved my life, again,” Phil laughed. “well just because you can do magic now doesn't mean i'm giving you up, you're still my servant” he looked back at Dan. “Now i'm never letting you go”

Dan felt his eyes well up with tears. He was so scared yet so loved. Phil was not afraid of him, was not wanting to throw him out. Dan stood up standing in front of Phil for a moment before slamming his hand on the table.

“How can you be so calm about this!” Dan shouted looking at Phil, it wasn't fair, Dan was in a panic and Phil was acting like Dan just told him he had an extra toe. This was magic they were dealing with. How dare Phil act like it was not a big deal.

“I find in time's like these it's best to just accept the situation on hand and find the most reasonable course of action” Phil smiled a kind smile. The one that made Dan trust every word out of that mouth. Made his heart swell with the simple turn of his lips.

“What do we do?” Dan asked slowly sitting back down.

Phil sat quietly for a moment thinking it over.

“We do not tell anyone about this, I don't know what would happen if someone found out you can do magic, you could be taken away, executed, experimented on, forced to reproduce, I don't know, but you are not something I am willing to risk”

“What do _we_ do with me?”

“Keep reading, I want you to find out everything you can on magic, I'm going to find you a teacher”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I found the plot, also i dont have a proper editor doing anything to this yet, so bare with me xD


	7. Being smart is useless without someone to be smarter than. It's why you're here.

Finding a teacher would be no easy task. Magic has not been used in so long, but that couldn't mean it was extinct. Phil did not give up hope. Talk around the market informed him that there was a magician coming to Anifall from a neighboring country. Phil could hardly contain his excitement. A magician, known by the name Glen the powerful wizard, was coming to their country. It gave him hope. He hoped they would be able to talk to him convince him to teach Dan what he knew. Any new knowledge would be helpful at this point.

The two young men walked through the market together. There was something comforting about the market. It was different from the shops, enclosed building's where one could go to find whatever it was they needed. Such as fresh towels, new jewelry from a specific designer. The market was where one went unsure what they needed. There was always something new. It was completely run and managed by the townfolk, and they certainly did a great job.

Dan and Phil looked around at the stands. Each of the vendors trying to attract the young lord to their selection of items. The smell of chocolate filled Dan's nose, drawing him in.

“Do you smell that?” Dan asked walking toward the delicious scent.

Phil followed close behind his servant through the steady moving citizens. As they got closer Phil was able to smell it too. They approached the vendor selling chocolate and Dan stopped infront of the stand.

“Hello young man, how can I help you?” The vendor asked, smiling a genuinely kind smile.

Dan's pushed his hair out of his face a bit to look at the candy on the table in front of him.

“What is this?” Dan asked pointing to the bag of spherical shaped chocolates.

The man nodded and picked up a bag next to him opening it to offer Dan and Phil a chocolate. Dan eagerly reached into the bag and popped a chocolate into his mouth, he bit into it surprised how it crunched. There was a dry sweet center.

“What is it?” Dan asked covering his mouth to speak. His tongue rolling around the remaining chocolate in his mouth to savor the sweetness. Dan usually had chocolate in the form of cookies or cakes. To have it in such a concentrated form was such a treat.

“It is a dried honeycomb dipped in our homemade milk chocolate, my family has the coco beans imported to us from Gulonde,” The man explained.

Dan looked back at Phil for a second. Dan had his own money, he was paid monthly by the Lester family. But he had a hard time spending on himself, being raised in an orphanage where he could never ask the nuns for silly wants such as chocolate.

“We'll have 2 bags please,” Phil spoke. He could see the want in Dan's eyes peaking out behind his hair and didn't want to deny Dan simple pleasures such as chocolate.

The man nodded excitedly and opened a gift bag to package the two bags of treats inside. Phil exchanged the money with the vendor and the two boy's carried on, making their way toward the center pavilion to see the magician.

Dan couldn't wait to dig into his chocolate. His hands found their way into the paper bag he was holding and pulled out the small plastic bag of chocolate. He smiled as the sweet taste of chocolate covered his tongue.

“Do you want your bag now?” Dan asked holding the paper bag out to Phil.

“Oh, no thank you, they are both for you, I figured you would go through the first bag before we got back home,” Phil smirked at his friend he knew too well.

They entered the bustling pavilion, everyone in the Lester Region must have heard about the magician showing today. As second heir to the Lester family, Phil could have used his title to gain the two of them front row seating. But Phil did not believe in that sort of thing. Besides it was being able to talk to him after words that was really important. Dan and Phil found their place standing at the back of the pavilion with a surprisingly great view of the stage.

A thought snuck into Phil's head making him smile. Phil leaned closer to Dan, tucking his chin over the younger's shoulder.

“Those candies were much too sweet for me,” Phil said nuzzling Dan's ear slightly. Hoping no one who saw them would see it as affectionate as it was meant to be. “You're all the sweetness I need in my life”

Dan let out a coughing laugh and looked back at his friend and master.

“Please, I'm bitterness,” Dan turned away trying to calm the flush on his cheeks.

“I've noticed,” Phil laughed standing up straight as the show was about to begin.

Smoked slowly leaked out onto the stage and with a bang a flash and a puff of smoke rising to the ceiling there was Glen the powerful wizard right in front of them.

A roar of applause came from the audience as a stage monkey walked out to the microphone on stage right.

“Are you ready to witness the almighty, all knowing, all powerful, Glen the wizard!” the man shouted in the microphone and people cheered.

Glen walked across the stage, pumping his arms up to ear more cheers. Dan didn't understand why everyone was cheering, he hadn't done anything to earn their applause just yet. Appearing out of a smoke bomb does not make a wizard. Dan rolled his eyes and tried to focus. This guy may just be his teacher.

The stage monkey silenced the crowd as Glen began to speak.

“Could I have a volunteer from the audience” Glen asked. Peoples hands shot up. “Alright, i'm gonna do this at random, You” Glen pointed to pretty woman in the audience.

Dan shifted a bit uncomfortably, something about this all seemed hokey. Like the person at random was not as random as to be believed.

The woman walked onto the stage and Glen lead her to a spot on stage.

“Now my audience, are you ready to be amazed!” Glen shouted as the crowd cheered. Glen swiped his hand over the woman's face, her head and shoulders dropped like she had been knocked unconscious yet she remained on her feet. He put his fingers to her forehead and pushed her backwards. Her body held suspended in a diagonal. There was no way for the woman to be supporting her own weight and it appeared as if nothing was supporting her either.

The crowed made a soft gasp as they looked upon the scene in wonder. Glen smirked.

“Now something here doesn't look quite right,” He looked at the woman in front of him on stage for a moment before swiping his foot under her ankles and pushing upward.

His hand guided the still body into a horizontal position. The crowd stayed still.

“Huzah!” Glen proclaimed, he had made a body levitate. That was new magic to Dan and Glen had perfect control over it too. Dan could learn a lot from him.

The crowd cheered and whistled as they applauded him.

“We aren't done yet my friends. How can I continue the show now with a woman asleep in the middle of the stage, and I do mean, the middle,” The audience laughed. Glen pulled out a blanket covering the woman's body.

Glen looked around at the audience for a brief moment before grabbing the sheet and yanking it off the woman revealing empty space. The woman was gone. The audience froze in horror for a moment before a voice was heard in the back.

“What did I miss?” The woman who volunteered appeared from the back of the pavilion and walked forward toward the stage again.

The audience boomed with applause. Now he had the whole room hooked, he had performed such a magnificent feat that any little trick after that would be the greatest magic they had ever seen.

“What do you think?” Phil asked leaning down to Dan's ear.

“Something feels off” Dan couldn't explain it, but something just didn't feel right. It looked like magic, but it didn't feel like magic. Maybe it was because he was not the one performing it this time.

The air felt too still to be magic.

Glen continued the show, spontaneously setting things on stage a blaze. Pulling things out of a hat. Turning fire to flowers. The show was amazing, the audience sure enjoyed it. Glen left the stage the same way he entered it. In a puff of smoke. Now was time for the boy's to meet with him.

They quickly went out the front of the pavilion, hurrying to the back wooden trailer where the pair hoped they would be able to talk to the wizard.

The stage monkey who had introduced Glen for his show was carrying a box up to the door of the trailer.

“Excuse me, may we have a word with Glen?” Phil asked using his most professional voice.

The man balanced the box on his knee as he opened the door.

“No,” was all he said before disappearing inside the trailer. He was only gone for a moment before opening the door again and walking past Dan and Phil to cary another box of props inside.

“We need to talk to him about his show,” Phil demanded, Phil was too gentle looking to be demanding.

“Look kid, Glen doesn't talk to anyone, and he doesn't do birthday parties, so scram,” The man was from out of country, he would have no clue who Phil was just from his face.

“It's fine, lets go” Dan tugged at Phil's arm. It wasn't worth it. Dan didn't want to be taught by this man anyway.

“I am the second heir to the Lester family that governs this land. I demand to have a word with Glen.” Phil pulled his arm away from Dan. He wasn't giving up so easily.

The man paused for a second.

“Alright spare button, let me go see what Glen says,” He disappeared into the trailer for a minute. Before the door opened again and before them a few measly feet away now, was Glen the powerful wizard.

“My lord!” Glen exclaimed a wide toothy grin on his face. “So glad to have you at my show tonight, my apologies for my friend, please come in” Glen gestured them forward.

Phil lead Dan inside the shabby trailer. It was heavily shaded, although there seemed to be quite a few windows, each had a curtain covering it. The dark room was lit by a few lamps. A few boxes cluttered the floor, filled to the brim with props for the onstage performance.

“We've come to talk to you about your show,” Phil spoke, getting his thought's back on subject.

The man leaned against a table, exhaling a laugh.

“Well?” He looked at Phil quizzically. “Did you want an autograph for your sister or something?”

Dan kept his eyes down. So far the man seemed to not be paying attention to him and Dan liked it this way. He didn't trust Glen and didn't want such a shady person looking at him, judging him.

“No, uh,” Phil's stomach tightened with embarrassment. The man seemed to mock him with the way he leaned back and looked down on the young lord. “We've come to ask you to be a teacher, would you teach my servant here, magic”

Glen sighed and rolled his eyes like this wasn't the first time he had heard this.

“No,” He stood up and walked back toward the door to let them out.

“Wait please you have to, we don't know where else to go” Phil rushed the words out. “We don't know who else can do magic”

“Magic? Is that what you think this is?” Glen scoffed, letting out a laugh. “I don't do magic, I put on a show, people are impressed with suspended disbelief, then they return to their boring lives.”

Dan bit his lip to hold back speaking. He hated the way Glen was addressing Phil. Dan knew there was something he didn't trust about this guy and that was it, the magic was fake. There was no one to teach Dan, he was alone.

“You know that's not true. The trait is gone because it wasn't a dominant gene. But surely there has to be someone who can still perform magic” Phil tried to keep his voice calm. But the growing frustration with this man was rising fast.

“Oh right that nonsense they put in the history books. Anifall couldn't bare the shame that the king ordered a genocide”

Phil pulled his sword out pinning the man against the wall. That wasn't true, the king split the lang because he decided the country would run better with three dukedoms instead of one kingdom. There was no way such a wise king would have ordered such a horrible thing.

“Just tellin you what my granddad told me, and his granddad told him, your so called great king was just a loony on a murderous rampage. But can you blame him, it was only a mater of time till those magicfolk turned on us. It's good for a show and nothing else.” Glen looked over at Dan. They had asked him to teach Dan which gave away that Dan was the one who could do magic.

Anxiously stepping forward, Dan grabbed Phil's arm pulling the sword away from Glen.

“Let's go,” Dan mumbled, keeping his face hidden from Glen.

Phil stepped back glaring at Glen. Dan opened the door anxious to get away.

“There is no place in this world for real magic, if I ever met a wizard I'd kill him myself” Glen gave Dan a knowing look.

It only took a milisecond for Phil to spin around and swing his fist into Glen's nose. Never the violent type Phil was shocked as he felt the mans nose crack behind the force of his hand. He kept his face calm as he turned around and grabbed Dan's arm swiftly walking away.

“You didn't have to do that you know” Dan muttered, not looking at Phil. Too embarressed by the whole event. He just wanted to get home.

“I won't let anyone talk about you that way, There is a use for magic, it saved my life, what more could it do to help your life and others” Phil continued pulling Dan along till they got to the carriages to be taken back to the mansion.

“What are we going to do about a teacher then?” Dan asked as he opened the carriage door for Phil.

Phil's long limbs climbed inside gracefully as he took his seat waiting for Dan to follow and the carriage to move.

“I will, until we can find someone who still knows something, anything about magic, I'll help you in anyway I can.”

Dan nodded quietly thanking Phil for not giving up on him. Dan acted indifferent because he didn't want to be a burden, but with all his heart he wanted to learn more. He wanted to do something, be worth something. With this he felt like he was actually of value to Phil, and to himself.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> why did it take me weeks to finish the last half of this chapter xD here is another forgivable sins chapter (im trying to brainstorm ideas for the actual title cause forgivable sins doesnt really work with the new direction ive taken it)


	8. It was a sweet day when we realized "legal and illegal" had nothing to do with "right and wrong"

Phil jabbed his sword forward toward his servant. Dan closed his eyes thinking as hard as he could, trying to imagine a barrier between him and the sword to deflect the attack. The sword made a light thud to the leather breast plate. Phil was not striking to wound Dan, but they had the breast plate on for protection because as Dan was proving now, Dan had no idea how to control his magic.

“Come on Dan, what did you do in the forest to deflect the wolf,” Phil tried egging Dan on. Trying to provoke him to protect himself.

Dan took a few steps back as Phil did the same, giving Dan time to see the attack and put up the barrier.

“I'm not gonna tell you when I'm gonna strike,” Phil began walking around Dan in a circle.

Dan kept his head straight, listening to Phil's footsteps on the tile floor. Then the footsteps stopped. Phil lunged at Dan from a blind spot. Although most of Dan's vision was a blind spot, Dan was hindered by the hair blocking his eyes. It was getting more and more frustrating with every failed defense. Phil swiped his leg under Dan's and elbowed him in the chest. The younger boy falling to the floor.

Dan huffed as his bottom collided to the hard floor. He looked down hiding his face even more from his master. Dan couldn't see enough to defend himself.

“You alright?” Phil asked putting his sword away and extending his hand down to Dan.

Dan lifted himself up without Phil's help.

“It's not fair, you're already trained to fight, this is an unfair fight, Phil!” Dan stomped his foot and turned away. “I'm done!” Dan shouted as he slammed the parlor room door behind him.

Dan's fighting inexperience was part of the problem. Another part being Dan had no idea what he was doing. He didn't know how he was able to deflect the wolf from attacking Phil. And he sure as hell had no idea how to deflect Phil from attacking him with a sword.

He took off the breast plate throwing it to Phil's bed that he shared with the older male. Dan wanted to be able to do this, he wanted to be able to protect Phil, protect himself. But this was useless. He was useless.

Dan ran to the in suite bathroom looking under the sink for the scissors. Dan pulled his hair forward cutting off a good portion of his bangs. Tears of frustration welled up in his eyes. The heavy feeling in his chest was suffocating, he wanted to be able to protect what was most important to him but with the way he was now he couldn't protect anyone. More hair fell to the bathroom floor as the scissors snipped the hindrance from Dan's life. If Dan wanted to protect Phil and himself he had to be able to see, and be seen.

Phil walked into his room, looking for his friend.

“Dan, I'm sorry for knocking you down, we're done for today” Phil called out seeing the light coming from the bathroom.

He took his jacket off and laid it on the bed next to Dan's breast plate.

“Dan?” Phil raised his voice a little bit louder.

Dan was shaking slightly, he couldn't believe it, he did it, he cut his hair. He stepped out to the bedroom scissors in hand hanging by his side.

“I can see you now,” Dan cried. His hair was a mess, choppy and uneven.

“Dan!” Phil rushed to Dan cupping his cheek to look at his face, for once not blocked by any hair and for a moment his breath was taken by how beautiful Dan was. He always thought the younger male was attractive but with his face in plane view he was stunning. “You're beautiful”

Phil leaned in and Dan thought for a moment that Phil was going to kiss him again and his heart raced as his eyes squeezed shut and he waited for Phil to close the space. There was a familiar warmth against him but it was not Phil's lips on his, just those perfect lips pressed to his forehead. Dan sighed softly, wishing Phil would just kiss him again. But last time Dan had reacted so poorly, he would probably never experience such a perfect person kissing him again.

“Phil” Dan whimpered pulling away and wiping his eyes of any stray tears. “Can you cut my hair?”

“Look's like you already did that yourself, love” Phil smiled running his hand through Dan's uneven hair.

“Fix it,” Dan pouted throwing his fist at Phil's chest and shoving the scissors in Phil's hands roughly.

They had Dan sit on a chair in the bathroom. Phil continued to run his hand through Dan's hair.

“I like it shorter,” Phil commented as he began evening out Dan's sloppy hair cut.

Dan felt so exposed and vulnerable, for once he wasn't hiding from the world, Phil could see everything and there was no hair for Dan to cover himself with. Phil walked around the front of Dan kneeling down to fix the front.

“I'm doing my best, but we should really get one of the maids to do this,” Phil suggested.

“No!” Dan's eyes shot up locking with Phil's, not letting him look away. “It has to be you”

Phil smiled gently at his friend and continued trimming the hair.

Once Dan's hair was finished he stood up and looked in the mirror, it looked surprisingly nice, the uneven cut he had originally done had worked well to create the asymmetrical haircut Phil had given him.

“We have matching haircuts,” Dan commented running a hand up through his hair and sighing.

“Not quite, but I see what you mean,” Phil chuckled and set the scissors on the counter. “How's it feel?”

“I'll get used to it, I'm not looking forward to the other servants commenting on it,” Dan frowned pushing past Phil to get back into the bedroom. He grabbed the breast plate off the bed and put it back on. “Come on, lets do this,”

Phil trotted back into the room to grab his rapier and followed Dan back to the room they were originally practicing in.

“I think you should have some sword lessons, it might help you out, what do you think?” Phil asked taking his position across the room from Dan.

“Just shut up and attack me,” Dan felt like he could see everything now, he watched carefully for Phil's tell that he was going to move. Phil was slower than he would be in a normal battle, he did not want to hurt Dan and the goal was for Dan to deflect the attack, not for Phil to win.

Phil swung the blade horizontally at Dan's breast plate. Again the sword made contact, making a light thud. Dan fell backward landing on his butt. Phil was in the process of turning his sword to jab downward when Dan slid down up onto his upper back kicking a leg up torward the attack. The sword felt like it had been hit with a bat. It flew out of Phil's hand onto the floor a few feet away.

Phil shook his hand. It didn't hurt but the feeling of being disarmed was not one he was used to. He looked back at his servant who was standing now and shaking his leg.

“Ow, ow, ow” Dan whined. He felt pain again like he did last time, like the surge of power through his body left an electrical charge behind.

Phil hurried to Dan grabbing his arm to steady him.

“You alright? Why does it hurt?” Phil asked, looking for a solution that he could provide.

Dan leaned into Phil, the contact made the pain stopped. He wish he had an answer as to why, but at this point he was just proud of himself for what he had accomplished.

“I'm fine, just not used to that I guess,” Dan smiled up at Phil. “I disarmed you” He said with pride in his voice.

“You sure did, You think you can do it again?” Phil asked stepping away from Dan.

“Uh,” Dan pouted briefly, sad to lose the contact. “Maybe”

Phil walked backwards toward his sword.

“Alright try and stop me before you get hit, if I was aiming to hurt you, you would've been dead,” Phil bent down to pick up his sword but just as his fingertips touched the hilt the sword slid across the floor farther away.

“Disarmed you again,” Dan commented from far away.

“Very funny” Phil retorted, glaring at his servant briefly before leaping forward. Grabbing his rapier he tumbled forward. Rolling back onto his feet gracefully.

The young duke only needed a second to assess his opponent and charge forward. This time trying to give Dan a challenge. He thrust the sword forward and it hit an invisible wall. Deflecting upward and away from his target. Dan smiled widely and jumped up onto Phil, wrapping his legs around his masters waist and his arms around his neck as they fell to the floor.

They landed with a hard thud and Phil's sword clinked on the tile, sliding away from them.

“I did it, I deflected the attack!” Dan rejoiced loosening his grip on Phil.

Phil lifted his body up looking at the younger boy beneath him.

“You did, well done,” Phil smiled gently, his heart fluttering at the closeness of his servant.

He could feel Dan's body pressed against his. Their pelvises pressed together was going to get very awkward very fast if Phil didn't move soon.

Dan's heart raced. He didn't want Phil to move away, the warm of the other boy's body was so comforting.

“Please kiss me” Dan mumbled, a lump forming in his throat in fear of rejection.

Dan tightened his arms around Phil's neck and Phil leaned in closing the gap between them. They had both longed for this since their first kiss. Stolen pecks could never compete to this feeling. Phil's hand tangled in Dan's hair pulling him in deeper. Dan moaned curling his back forward to press into Phil more. Phil's other hand slipped along the surface of the floor trying to give himself leverage to grind his hips into Dan's enticing more sounds.

In this society they could never be together. But Phil could not accept that. This felt right, the way his stomach flipped and his heart beat fluttered. It felt better than any of his tricks at parties. This was love, he knew that, he didn't hide that with Dan.

Dan pushed his tongue up to Phil's this time, taking in the taste of the older male. As far as things Dan had expected to get out of this life, kissing such a beautiful man was not one of them. He had accepted a long time ago that he was going to be alone. With Dan's sexual preferences and being an orphan, there was no way he could ever dream of such a luxury as someone loving him like this.

Phil pulled away for air, gasping as he kept his mouth close to Dan's. He didn't want to be apart now that he had permission to be kissing his boy.

Dan tried to think of something to say, to tell Phil to keep going. The pain in his back from being pressed into the tile was starting to throb but it was worth it to have Phil on top of him like this.

“Let's go to my room” Phil muttered, placing small kisses along Dan's jawline and up to his ear. “I don't wanna be caught”

Phil nipped at Dan's ear lobe and stood up. Quickly grabbing Dan's hand and pulling him up. Phil adjusted his shirt slightly where it had come out from being tucked in. then grabbed Dan's hand and pulled him out of the room.

They walked past a few maids unsuspecting of their previous actions.

Phil opened the bedroom door pulling Dan in and locking the door behind him. As Phil turned back around to Dan, the younger was pulling him forward by his shirt, tugging the decorative scarf off and tossing it to the floor. Their lips were reconnected in a matter of moments. They stumbled backwards till they fell into the bed. Dan laughed and crawled on top of Phil. He looked down at Phil who was gazing back at him with eyes filled with love.

“What are we doing?” Dan asked leaning down to smile into kissing Phil again.

Phil tilted his face up to Dan's, his hands running along the younger's back.

“Enjoying each other,” Phil grabbed Dan's ass pushing the boys hips down into his own.

“This is dangerous” Dan muttered grinding his hips harder, he hard learned to control himself since the last time, now he wouldn't come so quickly.

“I know,” Phil sat up and flipped them over. “I'm so in love with you, this is very dangerous”

Dan laughed. The idea of Phil being in love with him and declaring it so profoundly sounded like such a joke. Yet there Phil was pressing him into the bed and rocking their hips together. Phil sat back and tugged their shoes off. Dan moved back so he was in the bed properly not on the side of it. Phil crawled back on top of Dan kissing him deeply. His hand began pushing up Dan's shirt. Phil pulled away to look at the soft pale stomach being exposed. Dan yawned suddenly, he didn't want to stop but the magic had worn him out.

“Are you tired, Dan?” Phil asked, his hand massaging the soft stomach.

“A little, I wanna keep going though,” Dan yawned again, his eyes began to flutter shut.

Phil smiled kindly and kissed Dan's forehead.

“No, kiss me properly,” Dan whined, putting his arms up on Phil's shoulders.

Phil tilted his head up to give Dan a couple sleepy kisses from the younger boy.

“You can sleep, I understand,” Phil whispered and nuzzled Dan's cheek gently.

He looked at the time. Dan could have at least a couple hours of a nap before he would be expected to be in the kitchen to get Phil's dinner.

Phil unclipped the leather breastplate that they had yet to remove and wiggled it out from under Dan's body. He undid Dan's pants and removed them. This felt oddly intimate for Phil. Dan had always helped him undress and never seemed phased by it. At least what he showed to Phil he didn't seem phased. But as Phil helped remove Dan's trousers and tucked him into bed. Phil couldn't help the overflowing love in his heart for this boy, he wanted to cherish him.

Phil took off his own clothes and snuggled next to Dan. The younger man was already asleep so Phil couldn't ask how much he was allowed to touch him. Phil gently placed an arm around Dan's waist and not a moment later Dan had curved his body to spoon with Phil's.

“I love you too” Dan muttered, more asleep than awake.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took a turn I was not expecting but I dig it


	9. I love those quiet moments when we can stop pretending

Phil laid on the bed gripping into the fabric of Dan's pants, looking up at the younger boy straddling him. Their relationship developed was like a rainstorm. It began gently with a few droplets till it all came pouring down, soaking them with their love for each other. But if their relationship was the rain, Dan never wanted to see the sun again. He dug his hips harshly against Phil's, the friction and tightness of their pants almost unbearable. This was the way they had been expressing their sexual desires for each other. Although Dan had seen Phil naked plenty of times, it would be too much right now for them to both be naked. No mater how much he dreamt of it, the actual act would make him curl up in embarrassment.

Dan let out the softest of moan's, his eyes closing as he leaned forward and buried his face into Phil's chest. Phil kissed the top of Dan's head and sighing in pleasure as Dan's hips worked against him. He was glad they were finally honest with how they felt. It was pointless to deny themselves this. No one was getting hurt. So why should they have to refrain from doing something they both enjoyed.

There was a knock on the door.

“Phil, are you in there” Phil's older brother called from outside the door.

“Is the door locked?” Phil whispered to Dan.

Dan peaked his head up and looked over at the door, the lock quietly switching to the locked position. His skill with magic was coming along slowly, there was so much more to discover within himself. But he was proud of the little accomplishments.

“Mhm,” Dan turned his attention to Phil's neck and began biting at the pale flesh at the base of his neck. When Phil was fully dressed this spot would be nicely hidden from outsiders eyes.

The door handle fumbled slightly.

“Yeah I'm here, you need something?” Phil called out.

Dan could feel Phil's voice vibrate against his lips as he moved along the older's adams apple. His tongue tracing soft patterns, just to tease. Phil gasped slightly tilting his head back.

“I have an errand I need you to run, meet me for lunch and i'll discuss it with you”

“Yes of course, see you in 20,” Phil's hands slipped under Dan's shirt and teased one of his nipples.

Dan whimpered, pressing his chest forward into the touch.

“Did I find a sensitive spot?” Phil asked as Dan's hip movement became more erratic.

“Every spot is sensitive when you touch it,” Dan blushed. “I want you to touch me everywhere”

Phil flipped them over and began unbuttoning Dan's shirt. Dan's heart raced, he wasn't ready.

“I should get you ready for lunch with your brother” Dan suggested, gripping Phil's arm's.

“It won't take 20 minutes to get dressed, do you want to stop here?” Phil asked halting his movements. Dan suddenly seemed very much less into their actions than he did a few moments ago.

“No, don't stop, I wanna come, but” Dan blushed reaching up to Phil and wrapping his arm's around his neck. “I don't want to take my shirt off yet”

Phil nodded and leaned down to give Dan a sweet, gentle kiss.

“That's fine, love,” His mouth moved to Dan's neck. Dan made a sharp moan and his fists gripped harshly at Phil's shirt.

Phil rolled his pelvis against Dan's. Groaning into Dan's neck. Dan tried to stop his loud moans, afraid anyone walking by would hear them.

“Phil, I can't stop,” Dan moaned and spread his legs farther to allow more friction from Phil's movements.

Phil covered Dan's mouth with his own once more, the moans now being muffled by Phil. Dan let go of Phil's shirt and griped onto the headboard above his head. Phil grunted and jerked his hips forward once more, his body shaking as he came. His residual shakes sent Dan over. Dan's knuckles turning white from how hard he was gripping the head board. As pleasure of release washed over him Dan felt the pure bliss of an orgasm. Nothing quite compared to it.

Phil rolled off of Dan to the side. His breathing heavy and sweat sticking his hair to his forehead.

“Maybe it will take 20 minutes to get ready,” Phil laughed and turned his head to look at his partner. “Dan?”

Dan's hips twitched slightly at Phil calling his name.

“That felt so good,” Dan whined, his legs coming together to try and calm the sensitivity in his groin.

Phil laughed and rolled to his side to give Dan a kiss on the cheek.

“Same,” Phil lifted himself up and started undressing himself.

“No wait, that's my job!” Dan moved quickly to get off the bed, his legs still feeling shaky from his orgasm.

“You need to fix yourself up first,” Phil smiled and nodded toward the mirror on the wall. Dan stepped in front of it.

His cheeks and neck were flushed, shirt halfway unbuttoned and ruffled. Then there was the wetness in his pants from just coming in them. Dan started to finish unbuttoning his shirt, then stopped. Still not wanting Phil to see him naked. Phil snaked his arm's around Dan's waist. His own shirt already discarded.

“Dan, you're beautiful” Phil whispered meeting Dan's eyes in the mirror.

Dan worked the buttons down and shrugged his shirt off. He had nothing to hide from his master so he needed to stop acting like his body was something to be embarrassed about. Phil ran his hand's along Dan's shoulders and down his arms till their hands met and their fingers interlocked. Phil wrapped their arms around Dan's waist.

“See, beautiful,” Phil's lips brushed the side of Dan's ear sending goosebumps down the boy's neck.

Dan closed his eyes and leaned into Phil. Part of him was so sure this was a dream, that sooner or later he was going to wake up and be back in the orphanage. But if this was a dream he may as well take advantage of it.

“We have to hurry now to meet your brother on time,” Dan said pulling away. His fingers remaining connected to Phil's as long as possible.

They rushed to clean themselves up, washing the sweat off their faces. By the time they were done they were already 5 minutes late but at least no one would be any wiser to their affair.

Phil walked into the dining hall where his brother was waiting for him. Dan and his brother's servant went to retrieve the young lord's meals.

“You said you would be here in 20 minutes” Martin commented pulling out a manila folder.

“Eh, give or take,” Phil smiled widely at his brother who smirked back and shook his head.

“This is a bit strange of a task but we want someone nobel to do this, I'd do it myself but I have alternate priorities,” he opened the folder. “there is a lake that is said to produce a natural gemstone from the rocks and pressure of the water against the shore, I'd like you to go and retrieve a few for me”

Phil rolled his eyes.

“and what exactly do you need this gem stone for?” Phil asked.

“Well, I'd like to make a gift for lady Cornilia, it's our anniversary soon,” Martin blushed.

Phil gave his older brother a smug look.

“I knew it” He smirked as Dan and his brother's servant came in with their food and set it in front of them. “Yeah, sure, I can do that, but you owe me”

Phil began eating as he looked over the map his brother had pulled out of the folder.

“That's not too far, Dan and I could be back tonight,” Phil turned to his servant who was standing next to him. “Go grab your lunch, you can sit with us, we're going out after we're done eating,”

Dan nodded quietly and left. Martin scowled at the idea of Dan sitting next to Phil.

“Hey, stop that, it's been nearly 3 years now? He's my valet so you should treat him with the same respect you treat Clyde,” Phil nodded toward Martin's servant who was standing to the side.

“Clyde is a nobel,” Martin defended.

“Yet here they both are making our lives better are they not?” Phil pouted. “Please Martin, just let it go already”

The older brother sighed, he knew Phil was right but the mindset was hard to shake. Dan returned with his own food and took a seat next to Phil.

Dan remained silent, he felt like he had to be on extra good behavior in front of Phil's brother. Once lunch was finished the 2 headed out. They took horses instead of a carriage, where they were going it was too difficult to bring a carriage, no good roads for wheels to travel on.

Horse back riding was a new skill Dan had to learn upon becoming Phil's servant. For a while he found it to be pointless, but as he got more privileges for him to escort Phil farther off the land it proved useful. He followed next to Phil, keeping his ears perked for any sign of danger, although the land they were heading into was mainly peaceful territory. He did not imagine they would be attacked.

After a good hour of silence, enjoying the quiet of the tree's Dan spoke up.

“How much longer?” Dan whined, his thighs were starting to hurt.

Phil reached into his pack and pulled out the map, handing it over to Dan. Dan looked at the map trying to decipher where they were.

“This does nothing for me, Phil,” Dan folded up the map and shoved it back at Phil.

Phil laughed to himself and opened the map.

“Not long now,” he assessed where they were from the dirt trail they had been following.

“Rather be back at the mansion right now,” Dan's complaining continued.

Dan's complaining was not a bother but rather a much needed amusement to Phil. Soon enough the sound of water sounded in the forest.

“I think we're there, Dan” Phil trotted a bit ahead to check out the area.

“Oh thank god, I was about to turn around and leave you,” Dan sighed and followed.

They dismounted their horses and Phil made his way toward the water. The lake was beautiful, the water looked crystal clear, sparkling in the afternoon sunlight. The rock's glittered at the bottom, looking like diamonds. It was breathtaking.

Dan gazed out into the diamond water.

“Wow,” he exhaled, taking it all in.

Phil brushed his pinky along Dan's before taking the younger boy's hand fully in his.

“Is this okay? We're outside, we shouldn't,” Dan tried pulling his hand away but Phil held on.

“Dan, it's okay, it's just us here, enjoy this for a moment” Phil kept looking out into the lake. The world seemed so vast beyond them. There was so much out their in the world, why should the love of 2 men be a disturbance to any of this. It wasn't fair.

Their moment of serenity was short lived as they heard the crack of a tree branch above them. Phil spun around shielding Dan with his body and pulling out his sword.

“Who's there!” He called out.

Dan was pretty sure in his ability to deflect attacks now but he had to be able to see them first.

There was another crack and a beautiful creature flopped down from the trees. Her legs hung on a branch as her body hung upside down. The dress she was wearing falling toward the ground exposing her. Her skin was just as pale and clear as the water, sparkling almost with a pure porcelain shine.

“I can smell your magic, young wizard” the woman spoke, her voice airy and ethereal. She had the shape of a human but there was something beyond human about her.

She let herself fall to the ground, her dress floated down to her side. Platinum blonde hair blew around her as she moved forward at a remarkable speed, faster than the human eye could catch. She was suddenly right in front of Phil. He was frozen, he couldn't attack her, but he couldn't run either. The woman sniffed.

“Not you,” She exhaled and moved around behind Phil where Dan was. “It's you,” she smiled and reached her hand forward carefully moving to touch Dan's cheek.

“Don't touch me,” he snapped at her, smacking her hand away with an unseen force.

She pulled her hand back, her pale white blue eyes pouring deep into Dan's brown ones.

“I'm not your enemy Daniel,” She whispered and waved her hand passively at Phil. Finally unfrozen he turned around grabbing Dan and backing them away from her.

“State your business,” Phil said with a voice of command he had developed.

The woman tilted her head curiously.

“Business?”

“Who are you? What do you want from Dan?” Phil kept walking backward's trying to think of an escape from this celestial woman.

The woman stared at Phil with increasing curiosity.

“My patience is fading fast, speak now or I'll see you locked away for attacking us,”

“Is that what you think I did?” She blinked at Phil before turning her attention to Dan and ignoring Phil. “Dan? Is your name Daniel?”

Dan stared back at her nodding softly.

“You have your mothers eyes and hair, I thought I saw you died with her”

“How do you know me?”

“I've been watching the survivors for a very long time,” a sorrowful look struck her face for a brief second.

“Are you a witch?” Phil asked, part of him terrified of this pale woman, another part hopeful that they may have answers to Dan's powers.

“You are very curious aren't you young duke,” She turned around, there were deep red gashes on her leg's from where she had scraped her legs on the tree, blood was slowly oozing out of them. As she walked toward the water the wounds closed. She stepped into the water and it rose up her ankle, washing the blood away. “I'm not just a witch, Phil Lester, I'm thee witch”

“You have healing magic,” Dan breathed out in awe.

“Cell regeneration, you came here for these didn't you, young duke?” She bent forward digging under the rocks in the lake and pulling out a few large rough gemstones. “I am not your enemy” She held out her hand with the rocks.

Phil cautiously stepped closer to her outstretched hand.

“Give me your hand,” her long eyelashes were just as white as her skin, they brushed her cheeks every time she closed her eyes.

Phil opened his palm up to her and she placed the gems in his hand. Her skin was like warm silk as her finger's brushed Phil's hand.

“See, now put the sword away,” she commanded, she had power beyond their imagination, if she wanted to disarm Phil she would have.

“What are you doing out here in the woods, what dukedom are you from?” Phil asked.

“I live in these woods, I've lived here long before this land was divided”

“the division happened over 200 years ago,” Phil interjected.

“It seems you know your history, magic can do impressive things to the body can't it”

Dan grabbed Phil's arm pulling him away.

“Let's go,” He rushed into the forest, where their horses were.

“You'll be back soon, Dan Howell” Was the last thing they heard her say before they road away.

They road as fast as they could for a while before they slowed down and Phil took a chance to look back.

“I don't think she's following us,” Phil breathed looking over at his scared servant. “You alright?”

“She said my last name, Phil, how does she know that, I don't even know my last name,”

“I don't know,”

“And the survivors, what was she talking about, surviving what?”

“Dan, I don't know, let's keep going, we need to get home” Phil pulled the reigns on his horse around to guide it forward.

Dan waited back for a moment, the woman scared him, yet enchanted him. She was the real deal with magic, and she knew far beyond what Dan had read in books. He had to see her again.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hurhurhur my names mongoose and I avoid doing my important homework by writing fanfiction.


	10. What I know, what you know, what we know, and what they know, are never the same.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry christmas... bwap.

Phil franticly searched around an empty mansion. Dan was missing. They had gone to sleep together but when Phil woke in the middle of the night Dan was no where to be found. Phil looked in the kitchen, in the library, in the music hall. All empty, it was nearly 3AM and all the maids were sleeping, only people awake at this time would be the guards in front of the mansion.

Phil tried as quietly as he could to open the front door and ask the guards if they have seen anything. But as he opened the door he saw the guards passed out on the ground.

Phil's stomach tightened. He carefully walked forward and shook on of the guards shoulders. The buff man jolted awake and Phil jumped back startled.

“Where is my servant?” Phil asked sternly, he did not care if he saw the guards to the mansion asleep, his only concern right now was finding Dan.

“My lord I'm sorry we did not mean to fall asleep,” The first guard stammered as he woke up his partner.

“I don't care about that right now. Where is Dan?” Phil was just imagining the worst. Imagining the witch sneaking into their room and stealing Dan from his arms.

The guards share a look for a moment.

“Did you see him leave!” Phil's patience was gone, for every moment they wasted was another moment something could be happening to Dan.

“He came out the front door, yes, but we don't know what happened after that, he came outside, we greeted him and told him to go back in, then he...I don't know it goes dark from there, we must have passed out” The guard confessed what had happened. It was clear Dan had done some suspicious activity to these guards, but they were too simple to even consider it to be magic.

“That's it?”

“That's it,”

“No one was with him?”

“No sir,”

“Can you fetch my horse? I need to go looking for him,”

“My lord it is too dangerous, we can't let you leave the mansion,”

Phil looked at the guards incredulously.

“I can go where I please” Phil moved forward, If they wouldn't help him he could just do it himself.

“My lord please, your mother and father would see us exiled if anything happened to you, you can search for him in the morning”

Phil backed off for a moment. He did not want these people to be punished for his actions. But he couldn't let anything happen to Dan either. Phil pushed through them and ran forward, but a second later he was tackled by one of the guards.

“Let me go! I have to find him!” Phil shouted, surly waking someone up.

“Get back inside,” The guard pushed Phil back inside and shut the door. He escorted Phil back to his room.

Phil's brother Martyn was walking toward them.

“Everything alright?” He asked, looking at his younger brother, concerned.

“Master Philip was trying to leave the grounds past curfew,” The guard released Phil.

Martyn sighed and dismissed the guard. Phil glared at him, every second passing Dan could be in trouble. Martyn put a hand on Phil's shoulder and guided him back to his room. Hopefully his brother would not notice the bed looked like two people slept in it.

“Whats this all about?” Martyn asked flicking the lamp next to the bed on.

“Nothing, I had a nightmare...” Phil lied, he did not want his brother to know Dan had run off, that was just more reason for him to hate Dan.

“A nightmare causing you to try running out in the middle of the night, must have been pretty bad,”

Phil tensed, he felt like his brother knew already and was just trying to get it out of him.

“Yeah, it felt real, it's fine, i'm not going anywhere” Phil relaxed into his bed and waited for his brother to leave.

As soon as the older male was gone Phil leaped out of bed. He threw on his clothes in a reckless fashion. He had to hurry. If Dan left on his own will, Phil knew where he would go.

Phil threw a rope made out of sheets down the side of his window. It wasn't as easy as it looked to get down the side of a building, but manageable.

He didn't have time to get a horse. Phil ran straight into the forest.

He ran, and ran and ran till his lungs burned and he had to stop to breath. Phil leaned into a tree and heaved air into his lungs. The forest was dark around him and it was in that moment he realized he did not know where he was.

“Dan!” Phil called out into the emptiness.

 

Dan approached the water where he first met the witch. He wanted Phil with him but he did not want to put Phil in harms way if she was dangerous. It would be better if it was only him.

Dan knelt down by the water and gently dipped his finger tips into it. The moonlight made the water look like pearls.

“I knew you would come back,” A airy voice spoke behind him.

Dan stood up quickly, a burst of energy slicing through the air haphazardly. The witch moved out of the way of the attack with easy.

“As I thought, no control,” The witch approached Dan. “Where is your anchor?”

“My what?” Dan stepped back into the water.

“Anchor, the lord you were with, what brings you back, where is he?” She looked at Dan's feet in the water soaking his shoes and extended a hand out for him to come forward.

“I left him home, I needed to talk to you alone,” Dan stepped out of the water slightly toward her.

“You're hiding the pain right now aren't you? You need your anchor to perform magic”

“What about you, wheres your anchor?” Dan did not like the way she talked to him, like she knew everything.

The witch brought her hand up to her chest over her heart.

“Persephone” She finally caught Dan's eyes.

“Who's that?” Dan asked.

“Me,” She smiled and skipped away. “The water will stop the burning, a body of water can be anyones anchor”

Dan looked behind him back at the water and dived his hands down into it.

“I want you to teach me” Dan stood up wiping the excess water on his pants. When he turned around she was no where to be seen. “Persephone?” Dan called out.

He walked into the forest in the direction he thought she went. In the distance he saw a white light in the shape of a woman.

“Persephone!” Dan called out louder and the light disappeared. Dan ran toward the apperation.

 

Phil heard the sound of Dan's voice in the distance.

“Dan!” Phil called out again. Waiting in the darkness.

A delicate pale hand wrapped around his mouth and pulled him down to the forest floor. Phil thrashed around for a moment before feeling the pressure of magic on his body, stopping him from moving.

“Shhh, this is a test for him, let him find you, he needs to find you” Persephone whispered into his ear and released him.

“Phil?” Dans heart stopped, Phil shouldn't be out at night. “Phil!” Dan screamed and ran toward the sound he heard.

It was too dark in the deep of the forest, without the moonlight he could barely see the trees right in front of his face.

Phil tried to call out again but his vocal cords were frozen too. The witch crawled up the tree like a squirrel and hid somewhere out of sight to Phil.

Dan listened but couldn't hear anything.

“Phil!” He screamed louder. It was hopeless but he had to find him. “Phil!”

And with that scream light burst off his body, running across the forest floor till it found its target. In the distance now Dan could see a glowing outline of his lover. Dan ran forward with vigor toward the light. He approached the older boy, throwing himself onto Phil.

Phil gasped finally able to use his voice again.

“Dan,” Phil sighed and wrapped his arms around his servant, kissing his head a few times.

Persephone dropped down from the trees.

“You need your anchor to learn magic, until you learn to be your own anchor, if you want me to teach you, the young lord needs to be here,” Persephone walked away back toward the water touching the trees to leave a florescent glow behind her for the boys to follow.

“I was going to be back before you woke up” Dan nuzzled his face into Phil's chest. “You scared me”

“I scared you? You scared me, I thought she stole you” Phil caressed Dan's back.

Dan perked his head up and crashed his lips against Phil's.

“I did more magic,” Dan smiled into the kiss.

“Good job, lets go home and sleep now,” Phil held tightly onto Dan in fear if he let go Dan would disappear.

“But Persephone is waiting for us,” Dan pulled back looking over his shoulder at the trail of light leading them back to the lake.

“Persephone? Is that her name?” Phil released his grip on Dan a bit and rested his hands on his thighs.

Dan nodded. Phil was right, they needed to get back, but he was eager to learn right now. Dan stood up and helped Phil to his feet.

“Can we go talk to her then we can go back home?” Dan pleaded. Who knew when he would get the chance to see her again.

“Go back home young warlock, I'll be here when you need me again” Persephone was up in the trees again, she was so quiet when she moved, it was like she was just part of the air around them.

“But I have so many questions, how did you know my mother?”

“All in time, you have another duty to attend to,” She nodded toward Phil. “I'll send you two home,”

Persephone leaped down from the trees and pressed her hands to Dan and Phil's foreheads.

“I'll see you soon,”

And with that the world dissolved around them as it turned into Phil's bedroom. Dan moved around the room, taking in the fact that they were no longer in the forest but in the mansion again.

“What were you thinking running off like that!” Phil shouted in a whisper. He was glad he found Dan. And glad that Dan seemed to have learned some new magic, but the fact remained Dan left in the middle of the night without telling him. “Why didn't you tell me”

“Cause I knew you'd say no, plus she could have been dangerous, I didn't want you to get in that” Dan mumbled. Phil was being bossy and Dan didn't like it.

“You don't know what I would have said. You should have told me. You know my brother has been looking for a reason why you're a bad servant. If he knew you snuck out that would have been his reason, Dan are you listening to me?”

Dan was laying on the bed, passed out. The magic and the time of night wore him out to the point of exhaustion, he hadn't even taken off his shoes.

“Damn it, Dan,” Phil sighed and walked over to the bed. He shook Dan's hip slightly. “Dan, wake up, you're still dressed,”

Dan fussed slightly in his sleep, it looked like he had made an attempt to move and start taking off his shirt but he quickly fell back to sleep.

“I'm not a bad servant” Dan was talking in his sleep now.

“I know you aren't, love,” Phil pulled Dan's shoes off and dropped them to the floor.

“No, you're my love,” Dan rolled over, he seemed to be reaching out into the empty part of the bed where Phil should be. “Phil” Dan whined

“I'm coming, just wait a second,” Phil stepped back and stripped before crawling into bed. “You better be here when I wake up” Phil whispered into Dan's hair as he kissed his forehead and fell back into sleep.

 

 


	11. I'm not an exibitionist. Just desperate to be seen.

Phil stood on the ladder in the library. The Lester family's library was vast and Dan and Phil were both avid readers. Which now left them with a stack of books they had been too lazy to put back when they were finished. Phil pushed the book back onto the shelf and looked down at the stack of books that still had to be put on the high shelf.

“Dan, can you hand me the next book?” Phil asked his friend who was busy putting his own stack of books in the lower shelf.

“Uh yeah, sure,” Dan looked up at Phil for a moment then back to his business.

The book moved from the stack on the floor and up to Phil's hands. After four all day training sessions with Persephone, the witch they had found in the forest, Dan's magic was progressing very nicely. He could move things, track Phil's location, emit light, start fires, he still needed Phil to stop the electric burn in his body when he used magic but for where he started this was quite the accomplishment. He had control.

“Thanks,” Phil put the next book away and waited for the other to come up to him.

The magic was handy, almost like having an extra person to help Dan and leaving them more time to be together. If Dan could get all of his chores done at a fraction of the time he could be with Phil sooner.

“I'm done,” Dan called up to Phil, he held onto the ladder as Phil stepped down. His duty was to protect and serve his Master, Phil, even if they were in a library.

“Mhm, same,” Phil tilted Dan's chin up to him and gave Dan a kiss. They mainly kept their relationship to the hidden walls of Phil's room. But when Dan was there, Phil couldn't resist him.

Dan leaned into the kiss, appreciating it for a moment before quickly pulling back.

“Phil, you know better,” Dan warned as he stepped back. Although Phil may be more daring and willing to risk being caught, Dan was not so risky.

“No one's here, and if anyone comes into the library we would hear them before they got back here” Phil would never admit it but he liked the excitement of doing things in a more open area. When there was a risk involved it got exciting. But he was smart too, he knew what the penalty would be if they got caught so would never engage Dan in anything too risky.

Phil guided Dan to press his back into the book case, then brushed their lips together, lightly at first, he was checking to make sure Dan was into it. Although if Phil knew Dan, and he did, if Phil ever did anything Dan didn't like, Phil would know very clearly.

Dan's body tensed for a moment before he gripped at Phil's jacket and pulled his Master closer. He arched his back. Pressing the back of his shoulders into the books so he could push his pelvis forward into Phil's. His mouth fell open to let out a content sigh.

Phil pressed his lips harder into Dan's and his hands were free to roam. He pushed up Dan's shirt, untucking it from his pants so he could feel the soft warm skin of Dan's stomach.

Dan took a sharp intake of breath, his stomach flinching away from the touch of Phil's cool hands, then relaxing

“We're gonna get caught,” Dan breathed out. He tugged Phil closer, despite the warning he had just given, he didn't want Phil to move away.

“Not if you keep your voice down,” Phil worked the buckle of Dan's belt open. He pushed his hand down under Dan's underwear and cupped Dan's cock in his hand.

Dan gasped.

“Oh no, Phil, we can't here,” Dan hunched forward to try and move away.

“It will be fine” Phil pushed Dan back into the book case and looked into Dan's eyes. “I want to do it here, please”

It wasn't just the fact that it was somewhere where they could get caught that made it exciting. It was also the feeling that they could be out where people could see them, not hidden away. They could kiss in public and no one would think anything of it.

Dan nodded, he understood, he felt the same. Theses moments hidden in the back of a library was as close to being public as they could get.

“I've been reading,” Phil whispered, his mouth leaving open kisses along Dan's neck up to his ear.

“Have you now?” Dan let out a soft laugh, they had just put back a huge stack of books. Of course Phil has been reading.

Phil smacked Dan's shoulder.

“I read something, something I want to do to you,” Phil moved his hand along Dan's cock.

“Oh? Whats that?” Dan moaned quietly, curiosity in his voice.

Phil grazed his teeth along Dan's neck, earning a shudder from the younger. Dan dug his nails into Phil's jacket.

“I want to go down on you,” Phil whispered.

“Wh-what? What's that?” Dan jerked his hips forward into Phil's hand, to be honest whatever it was Dan would consent. He loved Phil so much and all the things Phil did with him.

Dan's face went flush as Phil whispered in his ear what it was Phil was going to do, he had read about it in books before, the act went by many names. Dan couldn't imagine his master doing such a thing to him. Dan was the servant, he should not be allowed to accept such a thing.

“Please, oh god, Phil,” Dan couldn't resist his lust, he wanted it.

Phil smiled and nodded, releasing his grip on Dan's cock and slowly he lowered down to his knees in front of his friend. He unzipped Dan's pants, pulling his cock out.

“Are you sure, you don't have to- Oh fuck” Dan's voice rose for a moment as he felt Phil's mouth around his cock. The wet warmth of Phil's tongue wrapped around him and Dan felt like he could melt. “Oh- oh-oh my god, fuck Phil” Dan gripped onto Phil's shoulder to keep him from falling to the floor right away.

Phil lifted his head up and off Dan's cock. Eyeing up the other boy. It was an interesting sensation to be going down on Dan, although he was not receiving any pleasure in the way Dan was, it was turning him on.

“Let me know what feels good,” Phil purred and lowered his mouth again.

He dragged his tongue up the underside, flicking it across the head and dipping into the slit.

“Ah-mm-that, it all feels good,” Dan ran his hand through Phil's hair. He never imagined what this could feel like, it was better than he had ever thought. All the wasted time they had just been grinding at each other through clothing when they could have been doing this.

“You're being too loud” Phil warned, one hand stroking Dan while his mouth was busy talking.

“I can't stop, Phil, I'm gonna come,” Dan let out a loud moan, his hand quickly covering his own mouth. Bookcases pushed across the room to hold the door closed. The books in the shelves falling all across the floor.

Phil had to figure out what to do now. He didn't want Dan to come into his mouth, he had no idea how it would taste and to be honest the idea sounded a bit gross to him. But at the same time he didn't want come to get on his clothes or the floor or the books.

“Come in my mouth” Phil made his choice, it couldn't be that bad.

“Wha-what? No, Phil that's-” Dan couldn't complete his sentence before a moan interrupted him, Phil's tongue brushed right up the underside and Dan was lost in pleasure. Before he could regain himself all he could see was white as the best orgasm he ever had washed over him.

Dan's come poured into Phil's mouth, the bitter taste quickly filling his senses. Phil pulled back, quickly swallowing and making a disgusted face.

“Oh that tastes bad,” Phil stuck his tongue out.

“I'm sorry,” Dan sighed as he sunk down to the floor. Sweat sticking to his forehead.

Phil smiled sweetly at Dan and leaned in to give him a kiss. As Dan opened his mouth slightly to receive Phil's kiss, Phil jabbed his tongue into Dan's mouth. Dan gently brushed his tongue against Phil's before tasting himself on Phil's tongue and pulling back.

“Oh god, i'm sorry, I didn't know it would taste that bad,” Dan cringed at it, there had to be something to make that taste better, or maybe he could get used to it.

“It's fine, that was my choice, you look so hot,” Phil leaned back in to kiss Dan again. “You have a mess to clean up,”

Dan turned his head to look at the library he accidentally trashed with magic. Phil's mouth continued to kiss along his jaw. Phil pulled away and helped Dan up. Dan adjusted his pants and moved forward toward the mess of the room. He put his hands up and the bookshelves moved their way back to their spots, the books flying quickly through the air back to the shelves. The room was cleaned in a matter of seconds.

“You are amazing,” Phil praised, stealing a few more kisses to the back of Dan's neck before they exited back into the eyes of the public.

Dan smiled, he liked when Phil praised him for magic. It was something he could do that was special.

“Oh wait,” Dan put his hand up toward one of the bookshelves and a book came toward him. He grabbed it and tucked it under his arm. “Research,”

Phil looked at the cover of the book. It was another erotic book.

“Thats dirty,” Phil smirked as he opened the door to the hallway.

Dan smiled a coy smile and walked toward Phil's room.

“Come on, I might need you for practice,”

 

**Author's Note:**

> LET ME KNOW ON TWITTER OR HERE WHAT YOU THINK IN GENERAL, I KNOW ITS NOT MUCH TO GO ON YET!


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